


Newtmas oneshots!!

by victeljen



Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, No Smut, alternative universe, newtmas oneshots, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:07:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 29,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24955054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/victeljen/pseuds/victeljen
Summary: A book full of oneshots for my boys <3I take requests, I just don't write smut :)
Relationships: Newt & Thomas (Maze Runner), Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 80





	1. Peter Pan Movie Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing beats cute cuddles

  
Thomas chewed at his thumbnail as he stared at the tv displaying a black screen. Minho and Teresa sat on the loveseat together, bickering about the movie they should watch. They had brought it down to two movies, two complete different genres, were Peter Pan or the Highschool Musical.

Their argument was cut short as the doorbell rang, signing that Newt had arrived. They quickly agreed on Peter Pan, though Minho grumbled a little because he really wanted to watch the musical, but he was sure he could watch it with Teresa another time, or that's how ateresa convinced him. Minho sprang up from the seat and bolted to the door, and pulled it open to reveal Newts shaggy blond hair and his sweet face. Thomas was sure his heart melted when he heard Newts British accent. The blond glanced over at the living room, spotting Teresa putting the Peter Pan DVD into the slot in the movie player. He looked over at Thomas laying on the couch, in Newts black hoodie and secured with blankets. Newt gave him a big smile and Thomas's cheeks went pink before he smiled back.

"So, what are we watching?" Newt asked, kicking off his trainers and walking into the room beside Minho.

"Peter Pan," Minho whined. "But I wanted to watch the Highschool Musical. I don't really know how Teresa convinced me." Newt knew that was a lie, Minho didn't say it but he would really do anything for the girl, but Newt chuckled a little at Minho's antics, and plopped down beside Thomas. Minho done the same with Teresa, though she almost flew off of the beanbag because Minho purposely jumped onto him rather than calmly sitting.

"Hey Tommy, I missed you." Newt mumbled, sliding his hand round Thomas's waist and cuddling against him. Thomas mumbled a reply, covering Newt with the blanket and hooking his head under the blonds chin.

"Oh hush, Newt, I saw you yesterday." Thomas smiled. They chatted a while about random things, and they planned on meeting tomorrow for a walk in the park before they done something else.

Newt was going to speak again but the lights switched off and the familiar tune of the Disney intro hushed the four into silence.

Throughout the movie, Thomas made several remarks about Newt going to the Netherlands and keeping his looks from a child, because it was no secret Newt looked like a child for most of his life. Newt swatted Thomas multiple times, resulting in Thomas, Minho and Teresa giggling like children as Newt scowled grumpily.

Thomas's leg ended up across Newts body, head buried in his chest comfortably as Newt twirled strands of Thomas's hair absentmindedly. His pale hand stroked lines up and down his back under the warm blanket they were cocooned in.   
Thomas's eyes began to close, warmth filling him with sleepiness. The aura of the room whispered calm, peacefulness and sleep. He was so cosy against Newt, and the blonds hands massaging his hair and back lulled him to sleep, and the mumbling voices from the tv accompanied it.

Newt noticed Thomas hadn't snickered and made a joke in a while so he glanced down at his face and stared. His cheeks were a soft pink, and faint freckles splattered his cheeks and nose. His eyes were closed and his long eyelashes rested against his smooth skin. Thomas was perfect, Newt noticed. His looks were angel like, soft with kindness and sweet as sugar, and his persona was adorable, kind and shy, but funny and dorky too.   
Newt didn't know how he got so lucky. Anybody would want Thomas, but he ended up laying in Newts arms. He couldn't help but smile brightly, and pressed a few quick kisses into Thomas's hair.

Newt sighed happily and closed his eyes, falling asleep quickly listening to the rumbling movie and Thomas's soft breaths against his chest.


	2. Soulmates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A soulmate au?? Where when you meet your soulmate a red ring appears on your pinky finger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not a oneshot book without a soulmate au

Brenda made an odd noise when Thomas suddenly came to a halt. He snapped his arm out and across her stomach, forcing her to stop too. "Brenda, I think-"

There was a polite cough from in front of them and Thomas's eyes travelled up, and they widened when he realised he had just stopped them right in front of a group of four teenagers who were looking at them weirdly. Brenda sent a glare his way and began apologising.

"I'm so sorry for him, I don't know what got into him there. We'll be on our way then." Brenda forced herself to smile at the group.

"No!" Thomas screeched. "I mean, no, I think one of you is my soulmate. Look!" He nudged Brenda's arm and she looked at his pinky finger which he was holding up. A small ring of red was beginning to appear on his skin.

Brenda's eyes widened excitedly. "Shit! Oh my god, Tom! Who is it, then?" She peered at the group with eager eyes.

Thomas's first guess was the only girl of the group. She had striking pale blue eyes and wavy dark hair that made her pale skin only look whiter.

The girl obviously felt their stare on her because she burst out laughing, gripping onto the upper arm of the boy beside her. Thomas frowned in confusion when he saw the bright red ring on her pinky. "I'm sorry, it's not me, I already found mine."

Thomas nodded, his eyes skimming over the asian boy she had been holding onto a moment ago, as it obviously wasn't going to be him. He then turned to a fragile looking boy, his hood pulled up over a head of dark messy hair, similar to the other girls. He looked as if he hadn't slept in months due to the large dark circles under his eyes. His arms were crossed tightly, his upper body drowned in a grey hoodie with black stripes on the arms.

Thomas tilted his head and thought, 'Well, he isn't _that_ bad.' He reasoned, but was quickly debunked when the boy shrugged and showed his red mark like a wedding ring. Thomas sighed.

Finally, he looked to the last remaining boy. As soon as his eyes settled on him, Thomas felt his legs turn to jelly and his insides go haywire. If this is what they meant by love at first sight, then Thomas wasn't complaining. The world seemed to stop spinning, everything moving in slow-motion like some romance movie, and Thomas was pretty sure hearts had replaced his eyes.

The boy was, in fact, gorgeous, with his blonde hair, brown eyes and a not-bad-fashion-taste. And to top it off, Thomas felt his heart leap out of his chest when he spoke in a British accent, introducing himself as 'Newt', with a smirk on his lips while he stared at his own pinky, which also had an identical red ring appearing around his pinky.

Despite all this, Thomas realised that during his whole lifetime he had only dated girls, and he had been expecting his soulmate to be a girl.

In conclusion, instead of a cheesy pickup line like he had planned, he blurted out, "You're a boy."


	3. Getting Rid of the Enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hero!Thomas  
> Villain!Teresa  
> Worried-about-his-dumb-boyfriend!Newt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hero!Thomas  
> Villain!Teresa  
> Worried-about-his-dumb-boyfriend!Newt
> 
> This was clearly written when I despised Teresa so there is kinda some bashing I'm sorry :(

  
"Yoohoo! Ohh Teresa!" Thomas's weak voice shouted, cracking painfully. He floated over rooftops, head whipping around trying to find a glance of a brown haired scabby girl.

He rose to the peak of the tallest building he could find and landed on the ledge. He didn't notice the screaming pain of his weight on his toes, though as he was distracted. He thought he saw something move, but as he peered closer a harsh shove to his back sent him plummeting to the ground. Or would have. Thomas snickered slightly and his feet seemed to evaporate into a black mist which looked to be holding him up. He floated through the air, smiling at the girl. Her suit was ripped in various places, dry blood staining the blue spandex. Her face was covered in muck, and a long scar lay on her cheek.

"You are no hero. And I am not dumb, Teresa. You can tell me. Say it. Say you are sorry." He murmured, beginning to circle the girl who kept her glance forward and her jaw clenched. When she stayed silent, Thomas spoke again. "Oh, right. You aren't. Shame. Don't you think all the people would like to know you're sorry?" Luckily for Thomas, he had known the girl for most of his life, so he knew how to set her off.

"You are a monster." She replied, breathing quite heavily. Thomas wasn't sure if she was angry or about to pass out.

Thomas smiled and looked like he might laugh. "Fuckin' hell, man. If I'm a monster, the fuck are you? Pretty sure I'm not the one fucking up everything and betraying everything," he emphasised, "for a fucking night out with the enemy. By the way, if you didn't notice, he was a waste of time." He added, smirking.

"You don't have proof. Even if you did, you wouldn't have the guys to tell anyone."

"You know I would Teresa. You cannot win." Thomas kept his voice clear and loud, though his body posture showed he was struggling. A hand held a gash at his side and the other hand looked crushed.

Teresa's legs trembled underneath her, and her fists clenched. "Run away, and never come back, and then I'll consider keeping your secret. Make a new identity and keep your head down." He said.

Teresa sucked in a breath, eyes glazed over. "You can't do this. Please Tom." She begged. Thomas scoffed and stopped circling her, stopping in front of her.

"Wh-How dare you! You have the audacity to betray-" He paused for a moment, sucking in a painful breath before continuing. "Everything! This is your fault." he seethed, stabbing a finger into her chest, knocking her back slightly, making her cry out quietly, but he continued. "This is on you. Not me, not anyone! You. You put this on yourself. And you know it. Honestly, to think I used to trust you."

Teresa's shoulders shook slightly with a sob. Her composure fell and she let a cry rip from her throat. "Oh fuck, I am so sorry Tom, I-"

"Do not call me that, Teresa. I will only forgive you if you leave, forever." His eyes softened slightly, knowing just how to guilt her into doing it. "Please, just do one good thing, for me."

Teresa squeezed her eyes shut and nodded, breathing out. Thomas breathed out, feeling quite pleased with himself. Thomas felt no pity towards her, knowing the bad she had done, the pain she had caused. It was frustrating, shall he say. Though it was an understatement, it fit his situation the best. Everybody sought Teresa out to be a hero, as she put the blame on her bad days on Thomas, making him out to be the villain.

Thomas shook his head and winced as he lifted the hand covering his gash. He extended his pinky to her. "Pinky promise." He said, thinking back to their childhood that they shared. Teresa paused, glancing at Thomas before doing the same, and locked their pinkies. His bloody finger slid into her dirty one, and they held the grip, before bending their hands slightly and touching their thumbs together.

"Goodbye Teresa." Thomas said, drifting away from her, now hovering over the city.

She gave him a nod before she disappeared into thin air with no sound.

Thomas shuddered a wracking breath, and that was when the pain settled in. His hip screamed in pain, his head felt as if a million needles were not-so-gently prodding away at his brain. His body felt overall exhausted and he hurt all over.

Using the still bloody hand, he reached into his back pocket and grabbed the cracked phone. The damage wasn't too bad, it still worked, but the cracked glass still got caught in his finger as he scrolled through his contacts and clicked on the contact saved as "big dick newt".

The phone ringed for a couple beats, before Newt picked up and his soft voice spoke. "Tommy? Where are you?" Worry was obvious in his tone, and just the sound of his voice made Thomas relax.

"Newtie, I- I'm gonna go to the back of that coffee shop we went to, uh, for that date that time, y'know where the guy though i was called Ronald," he could hear Newt's breathy voice over the phone. Thomas was rambling, he knew it, but he just needed Newt to come. "I'll be there, please come quickly," Thomas mumbled, voice cracking. Newt always made his walls crumble.

"Of course, love. I'll be there in a couple minutes. Hang in there baby, I'm coming."

Thomas sped through the air at a fast pase, quickly reaching the coffee shop and sliding down the alleyway and dropped to the floor behind it, next to a couple bins. His feet crumpled under him and that was when he realised his feet were utterly useless by now, he knew under his torn sneakers he would have toes at the wrong angles and very swollen ankles and he guessed his feet had been like that for a while but the rush of adrenaline kept him going.

He lay against the wall panting heavily, breath hacked and his throat dry. Dirt, sweat and dry blood covered his face. His eyes closed and he sighed, gripping tightly at his side with the hand that wasn't completely crushed. He glanced down at his hip, and groaned at the deep gash, just above his hip bone, going across his stomach and back, he knew from experience to expect a scold from Newt.

He wasn't sure how long he lay there for, but it felt like hours. He almost dozed off, but he had to keep awake.

"Oh, god Tommy. What've you done this time." Newt's voice came from beside him, starling him slightly. Thomas didn't have any strength left to look up at him anymore.

"'M tired Newtie."

"I know baby. But you have to stay awake for me, yeah? I'll help you up and we'll be home in no time." Thomas nodded slowly and let Newt wrap his arm around his neck and pull him up. He hissed in pain as his ankles burned in pain and his hip screamed in protest. He desperately wanted to just close his eyes and sleep but he listened to Newts voice encouraging him to stay awake for him.

Newt dragged him to the car, and he flopped into the passenger seat. He yearned for sleep but Newt kept him talking and kept making sure his eyes were open, reminding him he'd be able to sleep in a few minutes.

The rest was a blur, as Newt pulled him into the house and patched up his hip, wrapped his hand and feet and cleaned him up.  
  


When he woke up, his head burned in pain. His throat felt scratchy and when he called Newts name his voice was weak and cracked. Newt came rushing in and was quick to let him take a few small sips of water.

"How are you feeling, love?" Newt murmured, rubbing his hand over Thomas's head and let his fingers sink into Thomas's dirty hair which had collected a fair amount of blood, dirt and sweat.

"Like absolute shit." He replied, earning a dry laugh from Newt. Thomas could barely move, but he didn't mind now he had Newt with him. Thomas didn't know what he would do without him. He practically owed Newt his life, like 30 times over. Thomas let his eyes close as he leaned into Newts hand, which was removed shortly as Newt shifted to lay beside him.

"My silly boy, what am I gonna do with you?" Newt whispered, cradling Thomas's sore body as he talked him back to sleep with his soft voice and his gentle touches. Newt lay awake for a few minutes, staring at Thomas's sleeping face. Though it was scarred and covered in muck, he was still an angel. His long eyelashes rested on his cheeks, which were pale allowing the dark circles to stand out.

His cheekbones were sharp, resulting in being quite thin. His arms were not thin, though, they were muscular. He sighed sadly at the scabs scattered on his chest and arms and the white lines from deeper cuts. He wished for his Tommy to stop fighting all the time, but he knew Thomas had no choice.

He intertwined his hand with Thomas's good one and rubbed his scabbed knuckles as he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep too.


	4. I Don't Know How To Exist Without You p1

"Hey Thomas," Newt said, startling Thomas a little. He immediately looked over at Newt who was leaning attractively against the doorway to the kitchen because Newt almost never called him Thomas, usually using his pet names or calling him tommy. When he used his full name he did he was usually upset. Thomas noticed Newt looked almost grey, not only his skin but the aura surrounding him. He dropped his bowl onto the counter and walked over to the blonde, slightly concerned.

"What's wrong, love? Are you alright?" Thomas asked kindly, gently placing his hand on Newts arm which was shrugged off. Newts eyes seemed to water up slightly and Thomas frown deepened.

"I-" Newt began, but a sob cut him off. Thomas, now extremely curious to what was up listened intently. Newt took a deep breath, regained his composure and spoke again, this time his voice was a little clearer but it still shook. " We need to talk, Thomas."

Thomas felt a wave of anxiety wash over him, expecting and dreading the worst. "Of course, love, let's sit down and we can talk."  
Newt just barely nodded, almost like if he tipped his head any further tears would come streaming out like a tsunami and wouldn't stop.

Once they were sitting, Newt spoke. "I want to split up," he announced, quickly and painfully, almost like ripping a bandaid off, but that was an understatement to the pain Thomas felt. Thomas stilled for a moment, taking a shaky breath and then shook his head.

"No, i- why? Did i do something? I swear if I did we can work through it!" Thomas pleaded.

"I'm sorry, Thomas. I-I've changed for the worst and I'm not good for you, I'm so sorry."

"No! What do you mean? I don't understand! I-" His own cry cut him off, reaching his throat and spilling out like a knife. He barely noticed Newts eyes tearing up and a sly tear falling out his eye.

"Thomas I love you so much, we just-" Thomas cut Newt off.

"Then why would you want to split up?! I-" This time Newt interrupted Thomas.

"I'm leaving tonight, I'm so so sorry, Tommy." The nickname brought memories flooding into Thomas's head, making it a whole load worse.

"No. No! You can't leave me, Newt, please! I can't live without you! I- I don't know how to exist in a world without you!"

"I know you'll find someone else, Tommy. You're amazing, you're all anyone would want. I promise."

"Then why don't you want me?" Thomas said, much quieter; voice quivering horridly.

Newt didn't reply, face ridden with guilt and eyes teary and spilling salty water. Despite Thomas's honey voice, now rigid with distraught begging him to stay, to work things out, stood up and left the room.

Newt's head filled with visions of Teresa's pleasure filled face, the irritating moans of her voice screaming his. The guilt he felt was unexplainable. Newt wanted to scream. Newt was disgusted with himself, so disgusted that he had to bolt to the bathroom and throw up. If only he didn't go out drinking with them. He could still hear Thomas wailing in the kitchen.

He snatched his bag and walked out the door, meanwhile his longing lover lay on the kitchen floor, crying his heart out, murmuring little no's and yelling Newts name. 

-

short and shit, that's how we do it here. 


	5. I Don't Know How To Exist Without You p2

Thomas sat, fidgeting next to Teresa who sat chatting to Brenda happily. Brenda watched her with a look in her eye that Thomas recognised vaguely. Love. Brenda clearly loved Teresa, and made no effort in hiding it. Nor did Teresa. Thomas felt jealously seep through him.

Thomas felt extremely uncomfortable in the room. It was hot and sweaty and packed with people. He knew Teresa only invited him so he'd hopefully make at least one new friend so he wouldn't bug her as much. Teresa was his only friend now after all, though it was no secret that Teresa wasn't very fond of Thomas.

Then he heard a voice he could recognise anywhere. His head snapped up and he saw him. Newt. He was clinging to an asian boys arm. He was tan and muscular and slightly taller than Newt. And very attractive. Newt mumbled something into the boys ear, and the other boy chuckled and shook his head playfully, smiling at newt.   
  
Thomas's eyes watered and he just wanted to leave. He hadn't seen Newt in months.   
Newt looked around and saw Teresa and smiled brightly. They had obviously put their little affair behind them. As the two boys walked over Newt glanced over at Thomas, and immediately stopped in his tracks, catching the attention of the other boy. Newts eyes glazed over, threatening to spill tears.  
  
The two were now close enough that Thomas could hear what they were saying.

"What's wrong, love?" He heard the boy ask worriedly. Thomas remember when he called Newt that name. Newt just shook his head, though his gaze didn't leave Thomas's face.

"Nothing. It's nothing, Minho." Newt looked away and smiled at the boy. "Let's just go see T and Brenda.

Thomas quickly tapped Teresa's shoulder, interrupting her. She turned around and said, "what?" she sounded a little irritated, but Thomas barely noticed.

"I'm leaving, bye Teresa." He mumbled, vaguely hearing Teresa's 'whatever' but not fully registering it. He had to get out.

He stood up out of the stool and walked right past Newt, shoulder crashing into the blonde's and stormed into the crowd, shoving and pushing people left and right to get to the exit.

He left quickly, and outside the bitter cold started to nip at his bare arms. And then he realised he left his jacket inside. Fuck. Thomas began to cry. Everything he had blocked out behind a mental wall came crashing down onto him and poured out of his eyes in liquid form. He sobbed into his hands, shivering in the cold and cries wracking his thin frame.  
  
He sunk to the floor against the wall, burying his head into his arms and cried. He wasn't sure how long he was out there for in the cold till the british voice that haunted his dreams startled him.

"You... You uh, left your jacket inside." Newt said, scratching his neck awkwardly.

Thomas sucked in a sharp breath and and stoop up. He snatched the jacket with thin fingers and huffed. He turned and began walking to his car. As Thomas walked he slid the jacket on and wiped his wet cheeks.

"Thomas, wait!" Newts voice said, sounding desperate. Thomas only walked faster, pursing his lips till they turned white. "Thomas, please." Thomas shook his head silently and clenched his fists, striding on his toes. "Tommy." The nickname pulled him to a halt. He turned, slowly. He was furious.

"How _dare_ you call me that after you hurt me!" He spat, "you have no right. I don't even know who you are anymore, Newton."

"Thomas please listen-"

"No! How about you listen to me! Don't you dare play victim. It's your fault, all of it! You're the reason I fell for you. You're the reason I'm broken. It's your fault for sleeping with my _best fucking friend!_ Do you see what that did to us, to me!? Did you at least think of me, when you were having sex with her?"

Newt went silent. He looked terribly guilty. Good.

"Well? Did you?" Newt shook his head silently. Thomas scoffed, "You know, the worst thing is, even after all that, I'm still in love with you." Newt looked up a little.

"What? Really?"

"Of course. But i hate myself for it." He snorted. "Obviously you don't. What's his name, the boy I mean."

"Um, Minho."

"Well, you go back in and talk to Minho. I bet he's waiting. He might be worried about you. And I don't think he'd like you talking to your ex." Newt looked as if he wanted to speak, but he thought the better of it and turned to walk away. He walked a few steps before turning around and speaking.

"I miss you, you know," he said. Thomas almost crumpled, but he kept his head high and his eyes cold. Newt sighed and continued walking.

Thomas stood there for a few moments next to his car. He would've thought getting his feelings out properly and seeing the guild spread on his past-lovers face would've made him feel better, but instead he felt ten times worse. He longed to hear Newt voice again, even if he was just saying sorry.


	6. It's Okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: homophobia, bullying, blood, angst
> 
> This chapter contains f slur uncensored. If you want me to censor it I will do so I have just done it for the purpose of writing.

Newt walked to school with a heavy feeling in his stomach. Not that that was unusual, but it was worse today. He wasn't sure what it was though. He was nearing the school gates, so he ducked his head and pulled his hood up. His hands clenched nervously in his pockets as he occasionally glanced up to look for a brown haired boy. His stomach churned thinking of what could happen if Tommy wasn't here. That boy was the reason he wasn't dead meat.

He was early. He had left earlier to take a detour and walk around awhile and be back for first period, but his leg started to hurt and he didn't want to walk much on it. He limped over to his and Tommy's tree they sat at, and waited.

Thomas would've been here by now. 'Please, Tommy, please come.' He begged inside his head. He fished out his phone from his bag and hurriedly called him. The bell was about to ring.

"Cmon, cmon." He muttered, running a shaky hand through his hair. "Where are you?"

Thomas picked up the phone.

"Tommy! Where are you? I'm at the tree. You're gonna be late, the bells about to go."

"Hey, Newt, I'm sorry." Thomas's voice was scratchy and hoarse, and Newt had predicted the worst, and it happened. "I'm sick. I tried to tell my Mom I'm fine, but she said I couldn't go in and I don't want to leave you there because-"

"It's fine, Tommy." It wasn't fine, Newts brain was screaming to skip school today and visit Tommy, but his attendance wasn't doing good and he would probably fail his classes. He had to stay. "I'll be fine. Go back to sleep and rest, love." He said. His heart was racing and panic and he could practically feel the punches he would receive later.

"Are you sure? I can sneak out and come, I might be late though."

"No Tommy," Newt assured. "You need to get better, yeah?" The bell rang. Despite his gut telling him to stay, Newt got up and began walking towards the building. "I gotta go now, bye Tommy."

"Okay, Newt. Be careful, call me if anything happens and I'll come." Newt smiled lightly.

"I will. I'll come over later. See you," Newt said, and hung up the call.

He took a shaky breath. "Fuck."

—

The first few periods were fine, but between third and fourth period it all went to shit. He was running late for fourth period. The halls were empty aside from a stray studen running into classes. He had to walk up two flights of stairs and his leg was burning. As he limped, his arm was pulled harshly and he tumbled over onto his side, hitting his head against a locker. "Fuck!" He exclaimed in fright and pain.

"Hey Newt, hows it going?" A familiar voice said, in a fake British accent, mocking him. Newt's stomach churned. When he said nothing, he felt a hand in his hair, pulling him up harshly. "Did you hear me, fag? I'm speaking to ya!"

"Leave me alone," Newt said, in a small voice. He felt so weak and powerless.

The boy snickered. Gally was his name. And the boy behind him was Minho. Newt and Minho used to be friends. But then Gally came and Minho changed completely.

"Oh, sorry!" Gally said jumping back and putting his hands up behind his head in fake surrender. Minho laughed loudly but Newt curled into himself. Even if he managed to get up he would be able to walk far, forget running.

Gally knelt down, and pushed his face up to Newts. Gally's breath smelt like jerky, Newt thought. But then he doubled over and Gally punched him in his stomach.

"Faggot. You think you and your little boyfriend can go around snogging everywhere? That shits gross. Talking of Thomas? Where is he? Oh yeah, he's absent, right? That means I can do every little thing to you." Gally said, throwing another punch at Newts stomach. Newt felt like throwing up.

He couldn't even think straight, before Gally smacked him in his throat, right in his airway. He couldn't breathe. Fuck, fuck. He couldn't breathe. Newt twisted and turned, holding his neck and trying to suck in a breath. He felt more punches all over him, and kicks to his leg and his shoulders, his head and everywhere.

Minho yanked on his shirt, pulling him up. He was way taller than Newt, and Newt dangled in the air, head lolling and moaning in pain. Minho threw him into the lockers, and he felt something very hard connect to his head and then it all went black. His head was ringing, and he heard Gally and Minho shout, "Fuck!" And their shoes squeaking in the quiet halls and they ran so they wouldn't get caught. Then it was silent. He could feel something liquidy dripping down his forehead and down his face. And then he blacked out.

—

The next time he woke up he felt arms all over him, and could see flashing lights through his eyelids. And then he felt something sharp pierce his arm. And then he blacked out again.

—

When he finally came around, he was laying in a bed. He knew exactly where he was. He felt a light squeeze on his hand and he gave a weak squeeze back. Then the person beside him jerked up and breathed out a small laugh.

"Newt! Hey love, how are you feeling?" Thomas's voice was still scratchy. Newt opened his eyes and he smirked at Thomas's clothes. He was wearing loose sweatpants and a hoodie with Thomas's dog's face printed on it.

"Fine. Nice jumper." Newt said. Thomas looked down at his hoodie and looked back up, cheeks pink.

"Shut up." But then his face went a little serious. "Newt. They said you haven't been eating well. You're so skinny. Why? And- And I saw your arms." Thomas choked up on tears. "I thought you were getting better." Thomas was about to continue but he couldn't bring himself to so he stopped at looked at Newt sadly.

"I- Sorry. I was! I was. I promise. I was getting better but then it all came back and I- I can't Tommy." Newt said, a sob interrupting his voice. "I can't." He croaked. His voice was so quiet. "I just- I thought if I didn't think about it it would just get better. It it didn't. It got worse. And I- I'm just so- worthless. I don't wanna fight anymore Tommy, I can't." He could see Tommy shaking his head with tears dropping down his pretty cheeks.

"I won't get better. I tried so hard but it just doesn't! I just wanna die Tommy. It's not fair." Thomas was going to interrupt him but Newt began rambling again. "I just wanna die so bad, I can't do it. Please To-" Thomas lunges forward and pressed his lips on Newts. His eyes went wide but he relaxed and closed them.

Thomas's hand held his cheek, and he wiped away Newts tears. He pulled away but their faces were still practically touching. "Don't say that. I know you can, Newt. Stay for me. I won't ever leave. I don't care what you do, just don't leave me."

Newt sobbed silently, and Thomas held his neck and let the boy cry into his shoulder. "It's okay," he murmured into Newts hair. "It's gonna be fine." Thomas held him close, cradling his small frame. His tears were silent, falling into Newts hair. Newt shaked with his cries, soaking up Thomas's jumper as Thomas held him and promised himself in his head to always protect him.

"It's okay." 


	7. Stuck In An Elevator

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: We used to loathe each other and now we're stuck together in an elevator that's not moving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thomas is a short claustrophobic boi in this

  
Newt was standing in his work elevator when it had happened. He didn't notice when the boy he hated stepped in at a floor until the doors closed and after he had pressed the floor number he dropped a few files filled with paper onto the floor.

"Shit!" He had yelped, crouching down and began gathering the scattered papers. Newt rolled his eyes and looked back at his phone.

"Rough day, O'Brien?" Newt teased, smirking but his gaze still on his phone. He could practically feel Thomas glaring at him.

"Shut up, Sangster." Thomas grumbled, and stood up once he had recovered the paper.

They stood in silence, Newt sending quick replies on his emails while Thomas stood and chewed at his thumbnail. Newt noticed the habit a while ago. Whenever he saw the boy more times than not he was biting his nails. Newt grimaced.

Suddenly, the elevator stopped. The doors didn't open and they were still supposed to be going up. Newt looked up, and looked at Thomas. The brunette was frozen, face flushed with fear.

"Hey, is this thing stuck? It bloody better not be, I can't risk my brain cells being stuck in here with you." Newt sneered. Thomas didn't seem to react, unlike usual where he would reply with a snarky comeback. "O'Brien? You there?" He said, waving his hand up to Thomas' face.

He suddenly jerked back and said, "Are we stuck?" Newt shrugged, seemingly not bothered but Thomas dropped the papers again by his feet. His hands were trembling. "I need to get out." He squeaked, his voice small.

"Oh come on, I'm not that bad." Newt said, smirking. Thomas didn't smile. Instead he shook his head and swallowed thickly. He looked very pale, and he looked as if he was building a sweat.

"I-it's not that, it's-" Thomas stuttered, unable to form words. Newt frowned a little.

"Hey, you okay? It's not that bad, we'll be out soon." But Thomas still shook his head, his breathing going uneven. "Oh shit, are you claustrophobic?"

Thomas nodded a little, and looked at Newt with watery eyes. "Fuck. Uh, what do I do?" Newt said, panicking. He didn't want Thomas screaming and beating the walls.

Thomas didn't look like he was listening. "Okay, uh, sit down." Newt stammered. He gently took hold of Thomas' arms and sat down, pulling him next to him. Thomas pulled his knees up and grabbed Newts hand. Newt froze, staring at the boy.

"Can't—I—I can't breathe," Thomas stuttered, crushing Newts hand and curling up closer to himself. His eyes were darting everywhere, as if the walls were closing in on him, and his breathing was rabid, breathing in more than he was exhaling. Newt looked at their hands, and flushed pink, but he shook his head and focused on helping him.

He shuffled round, now in front of Thomas. He used his free hand to hold his shoulder. "Hey, Thomas. Look at me. It's okay. We're gonna be fine, okay?" Thomas looked at him, but he was still shaking and tears were staining his cheeks.

Newt gently hooked his arm round Thomas's back and practically scooped the boy into his lap. In his state of panic, that was the only position he thought of. In any other normal day he was gag at the thought of Thomas O'Brien sitting in his lap, but Thomas's crying and shaking worried Newt. As much as he would hate to admit it, he much preferred seeing Thomas laughing and joking around with Minho than here like this.

Thomas looked so small, curled up in his little ball and shaking. He gripped onto the blond boys shirt desperately as if it would cure him from his panic. Newt slid his hand under Thomas's shirt and started to rub Thomas's back, fingers trailing over his spine gently. He rocked them side to side ever so gently, and whispered reassurances in his ear.

"It's okay. We'll be okay, yeah? We'll get out soon. I promise." Thomas could hear Newts voice now. And he felt Newts hand on his bare back. His hand was slightly cold, and it relieved him. His breathing calmed, and his shaking stopped, though he still shook a little.

"Hey, you okay now? It's okay, we'll be out soon." Newt said, still whispering so he didn't startle Thomas. Thomas only nodded, not feeling the strength to talk a lot. He rested his head against Newts chest as he breathed out heavily.

Newt began to move, and Thomas thought he was going to push him off, so he gripped tighter onto him and shook his head. Newt smiled and said, "It's okay, I'm just moving to the wall, okay?" Newt shuffled back and then he relaxed when his back hit the wall. They sat for a while, in silence. Newt continued to rub his back.

"Thanks." Thomas said, out of the blue, interrupting the quietness. Newt smiled a little.

"Welcome." Then, they began to talk for a while. Surprisingly, they seemed to get along quite well. They had a lot in common. If you told any one of their coworkers that they were in an elevator, practically cuddling, they would shake their heads and call you crazy. But there they are. 

And then Thomas fully registered the positing they were in. His cheeks flushed red.

"Do you want me to move?" Thomas squeaked. There were a few beats of silence as Newt thought over his answer.

"No, I don't mind. You can if you want to though." Thomas didn't move.

They talked for a while again, and Thomas ended up across the floor with his head in Newts lap. Newt had his hand tangled in his hair. They had only been in the elevator for around 45 minutes, and it was as if they had been very close friends for most of their lives. It was as if every insult they had thrown to each other had never been said.

Thomas found it was a miracle of some sorts. Newt made him forget about the fact that they were trapped in the small box. And to tell the truth, he felt slightly disappointed when he felt the box move again. He didn't really want to leave Newt.

But, he stood up, and pulled up Newt. Before Thomas could speak, Newt was already talking.

"You should come over after your shift. Or we could go out for a coffee." Newt said. Thomas smiled brightly at Newt.

"That would be great. Wait for me by the doors when your shifts done."

Newt nodded, smiling at Thomas. And then he smirked, as the doors signaled they were about to open with a ding, he grabbed Thomas's chin and tilted his head up. He pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. The doors slid open, and he walked out with his head high, and a smirk on his face. Thomas stood, frozen with red cheeks and a tingling sensation on his cheek where Newt had kissed him. Gawking at Newt who strutted away.

And then Minho and Teresa were pulling him out, Teresa asking questions worriedly Minho laughing at his bad luck, being stuck and it happening to be _Newt_.

Thomas spent the rest of his day at his desk, his knee bouncing, desperate to see Newt again. All he could think about was Newt with his stupid eyes and his cute hair. He thought about what they would do later. Maybe they would cuddle again. Maybe Newt would kiss him again. His cheeks flushed again at the memory. _Too soon Thomas_ , he said to himself.

He blamed his lack of work on his claustrophobia and his incident in the elevator, leaving out the part where he and Newt chatted for a while and he was practically on cloud 9. She nodded unsurely and raised her eyebrow at him, but she let him off the hook.


	8. Make Me Happy Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: he has the power to make you remember every aspect of life that you loved in hopes that you won't give up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: pills and mentions of self harm. It doesn't come up until later so I'll put a notice <3
> 
> ps I wrote this when I was hella depressed so some chapters will be really angsty but they get better

Everyday, Newt visited Thomas; and everyday he watched the boy fall apart. They used to sit and talk and laugh for hours, but now they barely talked. Thomas would just sit his head on Newts lap while the blonde ran his fingers through his hair and listened to his voice as he talked.

Newt would have to feed him too. He didn't try to wash him, because every time he did Thomas would look down at his body and cry. And even with his attempts of washing him with boxers on, it still didn't work.

He sighed sadly and shoved the key in the locked and twisted it. It clicked and he opened the door.

"Tommy? Where are you?" He yelled, stepping inside and dropping the plastic bag of groceries by his feet. He kicked off his trainers and went to Thomas's room. Amongst the bed, there was a lump of blankets with Thomas inside.

"Oh Tommy," he sighed.

The lump shifted and Thomas's head stuck out. "Hi," Thomas said. His eyes were glossy and his hair stuck out in every direction. On his cheeks were a few tear stains.

"Oh, love. Have you been crying?" Newt said gently. He walked through the messy room and sat next to him. Thomas barely nodded but Newt saw. Newt sighed.

"Sorry," Thomas said, biting his lip guiltily. Newt shook his head.

"No, it isn't your fault. It's okay." He said, shifting and laying next to Thomas.

"You don't have to keep coming back here, if I'm being a burden to you, you know." Thomas said, barely. It came as a whisper.

"Thomas. I've already told you. You aren't a burden. Okay?" Newt said gently, placing his hand on Thomas's cheek and rubbing his thumb under his damp eyes.

Thomas nodded. Newt smiled at him. Thomas's lip quirked a little but then his gaze drifted off and it dropped again.

"I bought you some food. Do you want something to eat?" Newt asking, getting up and going to get the bag.

"No thank you."

"Well, you've not got a choice. Soup or a sandwich?" Newt said, stopping at the door.

"Soup, then." Newt nodded and walked out of the room.

——

Newt has successfully got Thomas to sit down in the living room to eat his soup, and he watched happily as Thomas slowly but surely sipped from his spoon and ate the soup.

"I'll be back in a moment," Newt said. Thomas sat up, suddenly alarmed.

"Where are you going?"

"The bathroom." Newt said, raising his eyebrow at Thomas.

"No, you can't." Thomas said, putting down his soup and guarding the door.

"Thomas. What is it?" Thomas shook his head and didn't speak.

"Thomas." He repeated, "why can't I go? What is it?" Thomas didn't speak, so Newt picked Thomas up by his waist. He walked through the door and Thomas squirmed in his grasp before he put him down.

The bathroom door was shut, and Thomas had tried to pull Newt away but Newt shook him off and went in. He stopped in his tracks, though. He looked back at Thomas.

"I'm sorry," Thomas whispered, eyes watering up and lip trembling.

**TW: MENTIONS OF PILLS, BLADES, HINTING OF SELF HARM**

Newt didn't speak, as he looked back at the sink and saw the open bottle of pills. The contents were spilled all over the sink and floor. Next to the bottle, was a small blade.

"Thomas," he whispered. "Thomas," Newt repeated, voice quavering.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Thomas said, tears dripping down his bony cheeks. "I didn't take any of them, I promise." Newt stepped out of the bathroom, slowly closing the door behind him.

"Thomas. Can I see your arms?" Newt said gently. He tried to stop his eyes from watering up.

Thomas hesitated for a few seconds. Then he slowly began to lift up his hoodie sleeves. There were still all his old scars, white lines wrapping around his arms, but Newt only spotted one new one.

"Did you do any on your legs?" Thomas shook his head.

"N-no. I just did that one. And then I felt guilty because yesterday you said I was doing good."

"Okay," Newt said, voice cracking slightly. "Were you going to take those pills? All of them?"

Thomas was silent, but he suddenly sobbed, a loud, harsh, wet sob and then began to cry.

"Oh, it's okay. Don't cry, Thomas." Newt said, slowly wrapping his arms around Thomas and letting him cry into his shirt.

They stood for a while, Thomas weeping and soaking Newts shirt sleeve, until his cries lessened.

"Why don't you go sit down, and I'll clean up in there, okay?" Newt whispered into Thomas's hair. Thomas nodded and seemed to hesitate before detaching himself to Newt.

Newt walked back inside the bathroom, silently beginning to put the pills back inside the orange bottle. He picked up the blade and wrapped it with a few pieces of toilet paper and stuffed it into his pocket. He searched Thomas's cabinets for any others too, and any other he found he pocketed.

When he was done, he walked back into the living room and saw Thomas on the sofa, wrapped in blankets, quietly biting at his nails.

"Do you want to stay at mine for a while?" Newt said, startling Thomas a little. "I mean, if you don't want to I could stay here? I just want to stay with you so I know you're okay."   
Newt sat next to Thomas, wiggling into the pile of blankets.

"You can stay." Thomas mumbled. Newt shifted a little to get comfortable. After a few beats of silence, Thomas lay his head on Newts shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Thomas whispered. Newt wrapped his arm around Thomas's frail shoulders, and put his hand on Thomas's head, running his fingers into his hair.

"It's okay. You'll be okay. Just don't leave me." Newt whispered, pressing a small kiss to Thomas's head. They sat in silence for a while. And Newts hand stilled in Thomas's hair. Newt closed his eyes and focused on Thomas's breathing. And suddenly Thomas began to tense up.

"It's okay." Newt whispered.

In Thomas's head, were small clips of every time he was happy. Even the silly times when he was alone in his room, dancing to music or seeing a cute dog on the streets. And he saw Newt. And his parents. And his little sister. And Newt, again. And his friends. They ran one after the other, and a small smile was placed on his lips. He remembered when he learned how to ride his bike. When he made his first friends; Minho and Teresa. And when they introduced him to Newt.

And then it stopped. He was still next to Newt, with his soft hand in his hair.

"I think I'll stay."


	9. Logan p1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel!Thomas  
> GrimReaper!Newt
> 
> Where Newt has to take all souls to either heaven or hell and when a child cries in his arms it becomes too much for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> make it canon: newt is good with kids

Newt sighed. This was the last one for the night, and he could finally get back to Thomas. He closed his eyes, for no longer than a regular blink and when he opened them again he was in a bedroom. It was dark, seeing as it was night but the fairy lights that were strung across the blue walls lit up the room a little. He glanced around, a lump of sorrow building in his chest when he looked at the small toys scattered across the floor. There was a small rug in the shape of a dinosaur in front of a bookshelf with a few books on it. Children's books.

He finally looked at the small bed in the corner. There was a small lump under the covers. Newt didn't want to move. But he had to. So he crept up next to the bed, and slowly lifted the covers. A small boy, no older than 3 lay curled in a ball with a small bear stuffed animal in his arms. His thumb was in his mouth. He had a head of dark brown hair, similar to Newts boyfriend. He had his back to Newt.

Newt took a shaky breath and raised his hand and touched the little boys shoulder. No response. Newt shook him a little, gently. The boy whined and removed his hand from his mouth to rub his eye. Newt stared sadly, as the boy blindly reached for the blanket no longer covering his body and once he grasped it between his small fingers, he tugged it back over himself. He shuffled and hugged the toy closer.

Newt shook the boy again, this time whispering, "Hey. Wake up," Newt wasn't great with children. The child's eyes suddenly opened. He didn't recognise Newts voice. He flipped over quickly at sat up, staring up at Newt with big, scared eyes. To make it worse, Newt was wearing a long black cloak with his hood up, and a scythe in his hand. He began to cry. He shouted for his Mama, and the boy cried more when she didn't come. Newt flicked his wrist ever so slightly and the scythe disappeared, as well as his cloak. He was left him black jeans, chains hanging from his belt loops and a black button up under a leather jacket.

"Hey, hey. Don't cry," he whispered, hushing the boy, as if his Mother would hear his cries. She wouldn't. If she walked in she would see her little boy asleep. Unfortunately he wouldn't be waking up. "Your Mommy is gonna be away for a while, okay? Can I sit down?" The child nodded, terrified. When Newt sat down on the edge of his bed he shuffled into the corner, huddling into his blanket.

"What's your name?" Newt asked.

"Logan." His small voice quivered. "Am I dreaming?"

Newt looked away for a second. "You aren't dreaming. Logan, this is real," he paused. He never usually spoke to them. He usually just, took them. "You're gonna be leaving for a while. But you can visit your family. You just can't talk to them. And they won't see you." Logan looked confused.

"Am I dead?" Newt nodded, a lump in his throat. "Oh. Can I go see Mama?"

"No. I'm sorry." Newt said, shuffling back a little closer to the boy. "You don't need to be scared of me. I'm going to help you. You were sick, weren't you?"

Logan nodded. "It hurt a lot. But the doctor told me I would get better." Logan said biting his lip nervously.

"Do you want to sit next to me?" Newt asked, holding his hand out, ready to put it down by his side again if he didn't want to. For a second Logan was still, and then he pulled his small hand out and grabbed onto one of Newts fingers. Newt helped him out of his pile of blankets and next to him. His short legs dangled off the side, and he fiddled with his fingers.

"Where am I gonna go, sir?" Logan mumbled, staring at his cold toes that were in the chilly air of his room; he pulled his legs up and placed his heels on the bar on the side of the bed and covered his toes with his fingers.

Newt was surprised that Logan was taking this well. Usually when he announced they were dead, they would start screaming and kicking and punching his chest before they calmed down. Maybe he hadn't fully taken in that he was dead. "Well, you come with me, and I take you to a wall. Have you watched Harry Potter?"

Logan nodded, smiling a little. "Well, it's like the wall at the train station. We have to walk through it, and then that is where you find out if you go to heaven or.." Newt trailed off, shivering at the thought of this boy in hell. He would probably be an angel. Thomas would adore him.

"Hell?" Logan finished. Newt nodded. "Can I get changed first?"

"Yeah. Do you want me to help you pick something warm? It's cold," Newt said.

"But Mommy chooses what I wear."

"I know, Bud. But mommy can't pick it today. I don't want you to be cold."

"Ok," Logan mumbled, voice with a hint of sadness to it.

Newt stood up, and Logan followed.

——

"I'll turn around, okay?" Newt said, looking at Logan who had a pile of clothes in his arms. Logan nodded and dropped the pile at his feet, beginning to unbutton his pyjama shirt.

Newt turned around, facing his bed again. What was different though, is that the blankets had moved. There was still a lump in the bed. Logan. And in a few minutes, the clothes that Logan had taken from the closet would have returned to normal. Newt could hear the shuffling of Logan pulling on his clothes.

"I'm done," Logan announced, so he turned around. He was wearing a jacket that covered most of his legs, but under it he was wearing a cozy sweater and warm trousers. His feet were in his trainers, but the lace was undone.

"You want me to tie your shoes?" Newt asked.

"Yes please, sir."

Newt knelt down in front of Logan and quickly tied the laces. He done a double knot. "My name is Newt, you don't have to call me sir." Newt said, standing back up.

"Oh. I thought you were God." Logan said, smiling up at Newt. Newt grinned and laughed a little. 

"Not quite, Bud. Let's go then. Anything you want to take?" Newt asked.

"Can I take my teddy bear? He asked, pointing behind him to his bed. Newt paled a little.

"Ok, don't turn around. I'll get it. Just don't turn around." He sputtered out quickly, grabbing Logan's shoulders when he was about to turn his head.

Newt went forward and pinched the bear. But when he faced Logan again, Logan was staring at the lump in the bed, mouth open, face pale.

"Is.. Is that me?" Logan asked, clearly scared.

"Uh, yeah. Let's go."

"No, I wanna see Mama."

"I'm sorry Bud. Your Mom isn't here. We have to go." Newt said, looking at his watch. Logan's mom would probably wake up soon. And Newt didn't want Logan to see his Mom sobbing over his body. Newt shoved the bear into Logan's arms.

Logan teared up a little, but didn't cry. "Here, take my hand. Close your eyes." Newt said, holding out his hand. Logan took it and shut his eyes. Newt pulled Logan up, and Logan squeaked a little in surprise. He held the boy tightly in his arms and on instinct Logan wrapped his arms around Newts neck, eyes still closed.

When they opened Logan and Newt were in front of an old brick wall, in a dark alley. Logan's clutch on Newt tightened. "It's okay," Newt mumbled, dropping and arm and rummaging through his pocket while the other still held up Logan by his back.

"I want Mommy," Logan whined, pushing his head back to look at Newt. He was about to cry.

"Oh, it's okay. Logan, don't cry, please," Newt said, putting his arm back on Logan and looking into his big eyes which were tearing up. Logan didn't listen, and in a split second a big tear ran down his cheeks and he began to sob. He gripped his bear tighter and sobbing into it.

"Hey, Hey. Don't cry. Are you scared?" Newt asked gently. Logan nodded, still sobbing loudly.

"Okay. That's okay. You don't need to be scared. Do you not like the dark?" Again, Logan nodded. "Okay. Watch this," Newt said, smiling a little. He held up his palm and a small ball of light appeared, floating. Logan stared at the light, his eyes still tears but he had stopped crying.

"Newt, did you make that? Are you magic?" Logan whispered, still staring at the light, amazed.

"Yeah. Do you want to touch it?" Newt asked. Logan nodded. Newt moved his hand nearer to Logan, and the boy reached out his hand and touched it. Well, more like went through it. The ball wasn't warm, as expected. It was just about the heat of a bath. And it didn't sting, it was more comforting.

"Woah." Logan smiled up at Newt. "Was this the wall you said about?"

"Yeah. Do you want to go through it?"

"Yeah, yeah! Can you put me down, please?" Newt nodded kneeling down slightly to put Logan back on the ground.

"Hold my hand." Newt said, holding out his hand once more, while the other still held the ball of light. Logan eagerly grabbed his hand again.

"Okay, Bud. I'm gonna have to put my cloak back on, okay?" Logan looked a little nervous, but he nodded.

"Just remember it's still me under it, okay? Don't let go of my hand." Newt assured. He flicked the light out and he now wore his cloak, and the scythe was back in his hand. Logan gulped, But Newt told him again that it was just him.

"Ok, lets go." Newt said, walking forward, and Logan followed. Newt stepped through, and Logan repeated him.

Logan looked around, holding onto Newts hand tighter. They were in a large building, and clearly it was old. It was brilliant, Logan thought. In one hand he held his bear, and in the other he held Newts hand.

There were lots of people rushing about. They looked very smart, all dressed in some sort of suit. The building was split in two, Logan noticed. On the left, all the people rushing around had halo rings over their heads. Some even had great white inns on their back. On the right, all of the people had red horns sprouting from their hair if they had any.

Logan was going to speak but Newt gave him no time. Newt began walking, dragging Logan along behind him. They were walking towards a large desk, which was also split in two, with the same design as the rest of the building. When they reached it, a girl with dark hair and pale skin rushed to them. She had a halo over her head. The boy with the horns was obviously busy. He was rummaging through a drawer of papers.

"Oh, hi Newt!" She exclaimed, she obviously hadn't seen Logan yet. He was very short compared to the tall counter. "You got anyone today?" She asked, smiling brightly.

"Yep," Newt said. His cloak disappeared again. The boy had stopped in his place and spun around when he heard Newts voice. He was Asian.

"Oh hey Newt! How's it going?"

"Alright, Minho," Newt smiled.

"Newt, who are they?" Logan asked, voice quiet. He was shy.

"Oh," Newt said, smiling. "Can I pick you up so they can see you?" Logan nodded. Newt hooked his hands under Logan's shoulders and pulled him up to his hip. "This is Teresa," Newt said, gesturing to the girl with the halo. "That is Minho," he said pointing to the Asian boy with the horns. Teresa went silent for a moment, before smiling again.

"Hi! What's your name?" She said, leaning on the counter. Logan looked up at Newt, biting the ear of his bear and flushing red shyly. Newt answered for him.

"Logan. He's a little shy." Logan blushed and hid his face in his teddy bear. Teresa squealed quietly and Newt smiled.

"Hey, Logan? Can you tell me your second name?" Teresa said, ask nicely as she could, so she wouldn't make Logan feel shy.

"Uh, Plaid." Logan said, looking down.

"Okay, great! How old are you, Logan?"

"I'm turning four in July!"

"Thank you, love. Just wait a moment," Teresa said, smiling at them before turning around and facing the computer-sized screen on the wall.

"So, where do you think he'll go?" Minho said, startling Newt causing him to almost drop the child in his arms. Logan giggled at Newts shocked expression.

"Well," Newt said after he had recovered quickly, "I'd be shocked if he didn't go with the angels. Tommy would love him."

"Agreed. Anyways, how are you and Thomas?" Minho said, leaning on the counter like Teresa had done.

"Great," Newt smiled, Minho noticed how his whole face brightened up as he thought of his boyfriend.

"Who's Tommy?" Logan said, curiously. Newt smiled down at Logan. He stepped forward and sat Logan down on the counter in between Minho and himself in case he fell.

"He's my boyfriend."

"My sister has a boyfriend!" Logan said a little too loudly. He smiled brightly. "They're coming over tomorrow!" Newt's smile dropped.

"Logan, you won't be able to see them tomorrow. I'm sorry." Teresa had turned around by now and was watching Newt and Logan with a sad expression.

"Oh, Minho. He will be so alone." Teresa whispered, grabbing onto his hand. Minho didn't reply.

"Oh. Maybe another day then, yeah?" Logan said hopefully.

"I'm sorry Bud. You can't see them anymore." Newt said sadly.

"Never?" Newt shook his head slowly. Logan's eyes watered again and his lips trembled. He looked like he had begun to register that he wouldn't see his parents again. And it had sunk in.

"That's not fair. I want to go home please," his voice quivered. Newt chewed his on his lip. "Newt, I wanna go home. Please!" He cried.

"I'm sorry buddy, you have to stay here."

"No! Why?"

Teresa spoke. "Logan, sweetheart." The boy swivelled around to look at her. "You know what heaven is?" Logan nodded. "You are going to heaven."

Newts heart broke. Logan turned back to Newt. "Mommy said that's where people that died go to. Am I dead?" Newt could just barely nod.

"But- but, I'm starting school in August! I can't miss it! And mommy! I want mommy and daddy. Please." Logan had started to cry again at the thought of his parents.

"I'm sorry," Newt whispered. He couldn't help his eyes watering a little. Teresa turned away a little. Newt was shocked she even got accepted for her job.

"No!" Logan wailed. The floor they were on seemed to go silent, startled by the child's sobbing.

Newt pulled the boy into his arms and let him cry into his shirt. He lifted him back up again and he cried into his shoulder. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay." He murmured.

Behind the counter, Minho nudged Teresa.

"Go get Thomas, will you? Newt will probably be a little upset afterwards. And maybe Logan might like him." Teresa nodded, sliding out from the desk and bolting to find Thomas.


	10. Logan p2

Thomas was laying on his bed on his phone. He was on Pinterest scrolling through outfit ideas since recently his wardrobe has been pretty bland, though Newt told him otherwise everyday. Every so often his eyes would light up and with a smile he would save a picture to his board dedicated to fashion.

Just as he was saving another; a simple outfit, light blue jeans, white shirt and a blue flannel to match the jeans and lots of accessories to finish it off, there was a knock on the door. Thomas glanced up, quickly saving the outfit before getting up and quickly going downstairs, yelling, "I'm coming!" when they knocked again.

He unlocked it and opened it and luckily caught Teresa in his arms. She was panting heavily, and she rested her head on his chest before seemingly springing back up to life.

"Newt needs you. He's at the hall. And could you maybe drive? I ran here, and I think if I take another step I might just collapse." She said, already walking towards Thomas's car.

Thomas blinked. "Hello to you too," he murmured, shaking his head. He grabbed a hoodie from his sofa and snatched his keys from the small table next to it, he followed Teresa outside.

"You know you have wings. You didn't have to run. And that's a long way if you ran here from the hall." Thomas said as he got into the car and started it up.

"I just did a treatment on my wings yesterday, though. I wasn't supposed to be working today but they were short staffed and nobody would volunteer to go with Minho." Thomas snickered.

"He's not that bad." Thomas said. Teresa smiled softly but shook her head.

"Not with us. apparently if you don't know him that well then he gets real narky."

"Really?" Thomas said. "I thought he had stopped doing that. Why does he even do that job if he doesn't like it?"

"Good pay for a part time job, I suppose. Not a lot of people like working with a devil, and a lot of angels don't have the guts to check in every person that dies. I do it for the pay."

"Sure. We all know you do it so you can say with Minho." Teresa hit his arm with her elbow and Thomas laughed. The rest of the drive to the building was silent for the most part, except for the music Teresa had playing from the radio.

When they were only a few streets away, Thomas spoke again. "So, why does Newt need me?"

"Oh. Well he had to take a kid back. And apparently Newt turned into a huge softie for him."

"How old?"

"Three, turning four." Thomas shifted a little.

"Poor thing. What happened to him?" Thomas said with pity in his voice.

"I'm not sure. I don't think he was hurt though, he seemed pretty happy. Not traumatised. They're the worst. Especially if they're children. I usually get Minho to take them, Though, just before I came to get you he started crying because he wanted his Mommy."

"Oh god, Teresa. I think I'll end up leaving crying too. I don't know how Newt does it." Teresa just hummed. Thomas started to drive a little faster. Not much later, they were in the car park and Thomas found the closest spot to the entrance to park at as he could.

They walked inside, and luckily they didn't get asked for ID as they did because the guards recognised the pair. They walked over to the elevators, and they stepped into the one that opened first. They had to squash in with a few other people, but Thomas didn't seem to notice and he began to tap his foot, feeling a little more anxious than before. Teresa grabbed his hand and smiled at him. "It's okay," she whispered to him.

After a minute or two passed, the door pinged and opened and Thomas walked out with Teresa right behind him. Thomas strided up to the counter where Minho was leaning against, head resting against his clasped hands. Teresa slid behind it and stood next to Minho.

"Minho, where's Newt?" Thomas said. Minho lifted his head.

"Oh, hey Thomas! He's just over there. The kid's still crying." Thomas's gaze followed Minho's finger, and landed on where Newt was sitting. He had a small child in his arms and was rocking him side to side, hushing him.

"Thanks," Thomas said, and then quickly walked over to them. Thomas stood in front of them, but Newt hadn't noticed yet, and if he had then he hadn't shown it.

"Hi."

Newt's head snapped up at Thomas from where he sat, and the boy in his lap turned around with watery eyes and his thumb in his mouth. Newt's body relaxed, his shoulders becoming less tense and his jaw unclenching a little.

"Hey Tommy." He breathed out, sounding relieved.

"Hey Newt," he smiled brightly, and looked down at the little boy in his lap. "Hi. What's your name? I'm Thomas." Thomas took the seat beside Newt.

Thomas's heart melted when the child glanced up at Newt nervously, and when Newt smiled encouragingly at him he spoke quietly. "I'm Logan. Are you Newts boyfriend?"

Thomas blushed a little bit, but nodded. "Yeah." He said, looking back up to Newt. "How are you doing?" He spoke a bit quieter, sounded a little worried for his boyfriend.

"Okay. But if he cries again I don't think I can calm him down again. That's why I asked for you." Newt said, chewing his lip as he glanced down at Logan.

"That's okay. I'm here now." Thomas said, taking Newts free hand in his and brushing his thumb over his knuckles.

"Hey, uh, I'm gonna go grab a coffee. Can you take him for a minute?" Newt said after a few beats of silence. Thomas looked over to Teresa and Minho, seeing that they were busy.

"I could get it if you want?" Thomas said, but Newt shook his head. He looked like he needed a moment to himself. "Okay. I'll take him."

Newt nodded, looking grateful. "Buddy?" Logan looked up at Newt. "I'm gonna go grab a coffee, okay? Thomas is gonna take you for a minute. I'll be back in just a minute." Logan started to shake his head. His eyes started to tear up again.

"Shh, sh. It's okay, love. I'll be back in a moment." Newt hushed, voice sounding stressed, and he quickly passed Logan to Thomas.

The child began to wail again, and Newt practically ran to the elevators.

"Hey, look at me." Thomas said gently, trying to distract Logan from Newt leaving. "You're okay. I know it's scary. I went through it. Even Newt went through it."

"Really?" Logan whispered with a wobbly lip and tears threatening to spill out onto his rosy cheeks.

"Yeah." Thomas said, wiping away a tear that slipped from the child's eye. "Everyone in this room has. And I promise you, it gets better, okay?" Logan nodded.

"Are you tired?" Thomas said, rubbing small circles onto Logan's back.

"Yeah. I was sleepin' when Newt came." Thomas smiled.

"That happened to me. You know, before, when Newt was young, there was a different boy that did Newts job, and when he came I thought he was Santa Claus!" Logan giggled.

"I was sick. I wasn't allowed to go to school or nothin' and I had to lay in bed all day. And some days the doctor came to my room. But I'm all better now. My throat isn't even sore anymore! And I'm not too hot like I am all the time. Or too cold." He smiled.

"That's good. Why don't you try to go to sleep, hm?" Thomas suggested, and Logan nodded. "There aren't any beds here, so I'm gonna have to hold you, okay?" Logan didn't seem to mind as he shifted and laid his head on Thomas's chest.

"Will Newt be here when I get up?" Logan asked. Thomas nodded and put his hand on the back of the child's head. He closed his eyes and focused on Logan's memory.

He was standing in a child's bedroom. Logan's. There was a woman sitting beside the bed singing a song quietly, running her fingers through his hair. That was his mother. She had a beautiful voice, Thomas noticed.

Thomas stepped forward towards them to hear her sing. He stood at the end of the boys bed. Logan lay under a thin sheet and had his eyes tightly squeezed shut. The hair his mother pushed from his head was damp with sweat. In her free hand she held her sons small hand tightly.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey." She sang. Her voice was weak, and Thomas thought she sounded like she was holding back tears. She probably was. Logan's body began to relax as she sung, his eyes that were forced shut now lay closed and his grip on his mother's hand loosened. Thomas panicked a little. Was he dead?

"You'll never know dear, how much I love you."

Thomas stepped around his mother and put his hand under Logan's nose. She couldn't see him anyways. He froze, holding his own breath to feel Logan's on his palm. He breathed out in relief. Although Thomas already knew that he was dead now, he didn't think he could stay to see his mother press her fingers against his neck and find that there was no pulse.

"Please don't take my sunshine away." She finished. She pressed a kiss to Logan's cheek before she stood up and turned away from the bed, letting herself cry into her palm as she rushed from the room. Thomas swallowed thickly. She knew that Logan was going to die soon.

Thomas stared at the shut door with sadness, feeling guilt. And he closed his eyes, and once he opened them he was back in the hall. Logan was fidgeting in his lap.

"Shh, go to sleep. It's okay." Thomas whispered, keeping his hand on his head. While Logan couldn't see the tips of Thomas's fingers glow, he heard the clacking of heels and chattering go quieter. It was as if he was under water. Logan liked swimming.

Thomas began to sing quietly to Logan. He sang the same words Logan's mother had.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine." Logan began to relax a little. Thomas smiled. Thomas began to rock himself and Logan side to side ever so slightly, while he continued to sing.

In no time, Logan had fallen asleep. Thomas sighed out sadly. He kept his hands on the child's head, and his fingers continued glowing a little. Thomas shifted Logan in his arms a little, making sure he looked comfy while making himself comfortable. He closed his eyes, just for a moment until Newt came back. Thomas decided to keep singing, in case Logan woke up.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away." Thomas sang. He threaded his fingers through Logan's short hair as he did, attempting to recreate Logan's Mother's movements and rubbed small circles on his back with his thumb.

He could hear Logan's quiet breathing when he'd stop singing to take a breath. After a few moments he heard the chair next to him shuffle a little as Newt returned and sat down quietly. Thomas opened his eyes and looked at Newt. He smiled at his boyfriend who held a coffee cup in his hand. Only now did he notice that he had dark circles under his eyes.

"Sorry I didn't get you one. I know you don't like coffee but they didn't have any hot chocolate." Thomas ignored him, shaking his head.

"Newt. You should go home. I'll make sure Logan's alright and you go home and sleep. You look awfully tired." Thomas said, taking his hand off Logan's head and putting it on Newt's shoulder. Newt shook his head after taking a sip from his cup.

"Nah, it's fine. I can stay for a while, just till Logan's got somewhere to go."

"Well, okay. If you're sure." Thomas said with a raised eyebrow.

Logan stirred in his arms and Thomas noticed that the chattering and clacking of shoes had gotten louder and he had removed his hand from his head.

"Shh, go back to sleep. You're okay." Thomas mumbled into Logan's hair, but Logan ignored him and twisted around so his feet slightly dangled from Thomas's thighs and rested his right side against Thomas's chest.

"Hi Newt," Logan said, smiling sleepily.

"Hey bud, how are you doing?" Newt said, grinning at Thomas and Logan. He crouched over and rested his elbows on his knees and let his palms hold up his head.

"Fine. When I was gonna sleep Thomas sang me the song Mommy sings when I go to sleep. And it sounded like I was underwater!! I never have done that ever, it was so cool, Newt! You should try it!" Logan rambled, playing with the ear of his stuffed animal as he spoke. Newt looked at Thomas and raised his eyebrow. Thomas just smiled cheekily.

"Hey," Thomas said, catching both Newt and Logan's attention. "I think we should go ask Teresa and Minho where Logan's gonna go. Where do kids his age go?"

"Uh, I'm not sure." Newt said, scratching the back of his neck. "Usually I just take them up to the desk and leave them because I have another job to do, but Logan was my last person I've been assigned to for tonight and I've stayed longer than usual."

"Okay. Let's go up then." Thomas said, re-adjusting Logan in his lap so he wouldn't drop him and stood up. Newt followed.

"Thomas," Logan mumbled as they walked up to the desk. "Do I have to leave you and Newt?"

"I don't know, love. We'll see. Why? Do you want to stay with us?" Logan nodded, pouting.

"Alright," Thomas said, squeezing Logan gently with a kind smile. "I'll see what I can do." Logan cheered happily and Thomas just smiled brightly.

"Hey guys! What can I do for you?" Teresa said once they reached the desk. Thomas sat Logan on the counter like Newt had.

"Where's Logan gonna go?" Thomas said. Logan pouted and tugged on Thomas's hoodie . "Oh. And he really would like to stay with us if it's possible.

Theresa chewed her lip. "Well, usually they would go to the nursery when they're his age until someone takes them in. Unless he has a family member that has passed. Minho, can you check that, please." She smiled at him and Minho turned away and over to the computer.

"Logan, has anyone in your family, went to heaven?" Thomas said, after pausing for just less than a second. Logan shrugged.

"I don't remember. Sorry."

"That's okay. We'll just wait until Minho has checked and we'll see." They stood in silence for a few seconds, Newt watching Thomas and Logan whisper to each other and Logan giggling and calling Thomas silly. He smiled a little.

"So uh, he has an uncle that passed a while back but he isn't in the right condition to take care of him. He has a mental disorder, schizophrenia, I think. It doesn't specify completely. And the rest are grandparents and older ancestors and they've all gone to the next stage." Minho said, drumming his fingers on the counter.

"Where will he go, then?" Newt said.

"Well, he could go with you two, or he can go upstairs for the night and stay until someone takes him in. If you don't wanna commit to that right now, you could take him for the night and drop him here tomorrow and we'll take him up."

Newt and Thomas looked at eachother, Thomas pleading with his eyes.

"Wait a moment, please Teresa." Newt said, pulling Thomas away and leaving Logan with Teresa and Minho.

"Oh, please Newt! We can't just leave him." Thomas begged, grabbing onto Newt's hands.

"I don't know, Thomas. We aren't the slightest bit prepared, and what about our jobs?"

"I'll go part time. Or you could. We both have good paying jobs. We can make it work Newt. And the days we're not here my Mom could take care of him. You know she loves children."

Newt stayed silent for a few seconds. He took a deep breath and nodded. "Fine. But we're staying off work tomorrow to make him a room. Tonight I'll just transfigure him one."

"Oh, thank you, Newt! We'll do brilliant. I promise." Thomas beamed. Newt bent down and kissed Thomas's head.

"Love you, Tommy." Newt whispered.

"Love you too." Thomas said, smiling. He got on his tiptoes and pressed a quick kiss to Newt's lips before he practically skipped back to the desk with Newt behind him.

"So?" Teresa said once Thomas raced up and slammed his hands on the counter.

"Well, really it depends on what Logan wants." He turned to the child. "So, Logan, how would you feel about coming home with me and Newt?"

Logan smiled brightly. "Yes please!" He squealed. The redness from his eyes was almost gone and his mood had increased completely. Thomas laughed and hugged Logan.

"Let's go then." Thomas said, picking up Logan again and smiling at Teresa and Minho. "I'll see you two tomorrow then." Teresa grinned widely and grabbed Minho's arm in an attempt to control herself from screaming excitedly.

"Bye! Good luck!" Teresa called after them once they started to walk away. Newt turned back and waved before he turned back and slung his arm around Thomas's shoulders, squeezing him gently as they walked.


	11. Escapes and Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mentions of gore, blood and character deaths

"Fuck," Thomas hissed as his felt his ankle twist painfully as he skidded around a corner. He took another step and almost fell when a sharp pain ran up his shin but Thomas had no choice but to shake it off and keep running. He was panting horribly and sweat was trailing down his body in thick drops but the cold air that cooled him made it slightly less painful as he ran. He could still hear a few shouts and grunts and boots hitting the floor behind him. Thomas's thoughts suddenly clouded with the faces of his friends, and he could almost feel like he could hear their shouts of encouragement. He had to keep going.

"Keep going, Thomas," he whispered angrily to himself, pushing himself harder. His body ached and he knew if he kept going for much longer he would most definitely fall. He had to find a place to hide or lose the guards. He was nearing the end of the hallway and he would have to take a sharp corner and find a hiding spot if he wanted to avoid sprinting up another staircase which would most likely have one or two men on guard.

Thomas, feeling risky, took a glance behind him as he was nearing the end. There were two options. Left or right. Just as he did one of the two men tripped over his toes and fell face first against the floor, and not so gracefully flopped down. Thomas smirked. The other continued to run after Thomas but just as the guard took a look behind him, Thomas took his chance and swerved left, ignoring the pain in his leg and the ache in his body.

Thomas would have sighed in relief if he did not have an enormous stitch in his side and was severely out of breath. This way had a generous selection of doors. Thomas could hear the men catching up to him, so as he reached the third door down which was thankfully open, he slid inside and quickly, but quietly shut the wooden door. He fiddled around with the handle for a second before it clicked as it locked and Thomas stood back from the door.

Thomas stood completely still and held his breath, listening for the thumps on the floor of two pairs of feet. "Come on, come on. Go right!" He whispered, but it was barely audible. It was more of a small sentence of painful, quiet pants.

"Shit! You go that way, I'll go left," one of the men yelled.

"Yes, sir!" The latter replied in a higher-pitched voice.

One set of feet's pattering got quieter while the other got louder. The guard slowed to a walk as he reached the first door. All was silent. Thomas used his hand to cover his mouth and nose, trying to silence his breathing more. Thomas could feel his heart rate pick up in panic.

He swerved around, eyes darting around the room, searching for a place to hide. With Thomas's luck, he managed to pick a room with just about the minimum amount of furniture in the whole building. It seemed to be a staff room of some sort. It had a pale yellow couch in the middle in front of a coffee table, which had a few coffee cups on. There was a mini fridge against one of the walls beside a small counter that had a microwave and a coffee machine atop it. The other wall was just a window, so that was just about great. There was not a single place to hide in the room. He thought about trying to squeeze under the couch, but a view from a squatting position proved that the couch was only a few centimetres off of the ground.

Thomas was completely and utterly fucked. Thomas jumped when the door from the room beside his slammed shut. Thomas was spewing cuss words in his mind relentlessly. He took a quick few steps back and he grasped the gun from the holder in his belt and pulled it out. He clicked the safety off and held it up to the door. His hands shook from exhaustion and Thomas didn't know how he managed to hold the gun up. He flinched violently when the handle on the door rattled.

"Hey! I think he's in here!" The man outside yelled. Thomas's mind was racing. Well, racing with curse words. As the handle rattled again, footsteps padded up to the room and a bang from the door made Thomas just about shit himself. One of the guards was slamming his shoulder into the door but to no avail from the door. "Christ! You try!"

"Sir, I can just shoot the handle you know," the slightly squeakier voice said.

"Oh. Okay," there were a few beats of silence. "Well? Get on with it then!" He shouted angrily.

"Oh fuck. No, don't do that. Oh Christ. Shit. No," Thomas whined, terrified. His legs were about to give in and so were his arms.

There was a click and then the handle blew off of the door with a loud bang, skidding to the floor near Thomas's feet. "Shit!" Thomas hissed, head snapping back up when the door slammed open and off of it's hinges, Thomas's ears beginning to ring.

The taller of the two guards strode in first, coming to a halt when Thomas aimed the gun directly at his head.

"Don't move or I'll shoot." Thomas warned. The guard lifted his hands up in surrender. But there was a snort behind him.

"Dude. You think he could shoot? He's shaking like a leaf for christ sake," the smaller said as he stopped beside his guard buddy.

"Dave!" The latter hissed.

"Shut up. I'll shoot you and your friend." Thomas said. The guard rolled his eyes but also put his hands up. "Let me go and I won't shoot you."

The two men looked at each other, seemingly having a silent conversation between them. They looked back at Thomas. "Fine. Go," one said.

Thomas sighed in relief. He took a step forward and the guards stepped to the side, still with their hands up. Thomas kept his gun pointed at them as he slowly stepped out of the door. It was going smoothly until Dave decided to leap at Thomas. Thomas didn't hesitate for a second and shot him.

Fuck.

Dave snickered when he heard the empty click from Thomas's gun. Thomas's heart dropped to his feet. Dave leaped again and Thomas didn't react quick enough to grab the dagger in another slit in his belt before Dave successfully grabbed onto his shoulder and shoved his exhausted body to the floor. Thomas's gun slipped from his hand and hit the floor just as he did too.

Thomas slammed down painfully on his stomach, but twisted onto his back and slid his foot in between Dave's legs while the other hooked round into Dave's ankle's, kicking roughly. Just as Dave was falling, he kicked his other foot up right into Dave's crotch and smirked when Dave fell awkwardly, landing on the coffee table. His back stretched against it and his head snapped back over the other side.

He barely managed to get on his feet when the taller guard was going at him. The guard threw his fist at Thomas's chest so he used his arm to shove the guard's away, and he hit it hard enough to make him twist a little. As the guard twisted Thomas reached over and hooked his arm around the guard's neck. The guard's back was now pressing against Thomas. Thomas kicked the shin of the guard and he dropped to one knee. Thomas squeezed his bicep and the guard in his arms began to struggle, gasping for breaths, only to get tiny gulps of air.

Thomas used his free hands to slide out his dagger and slammed into the guard's skull with a crack.

Almost immediately he went limp, dropping down to his other knee, almost dragging Thomas down with him. With a little struggle, Thomas managed to tear the dagger free from the man's head. He released his neck and the guard dropped dead. Thomas was panting, and had to swallow to keep his stomach contents down as he glanced at his dagger and noticed that there was blood and a slither of brain on it.

Thomas spun around when he heard a gun click, which was a mistake. As he turned a sharp pain landed in his left shoulder. He let out a strangled moan. Dave was at the other side of the room holding a small pistol. His hand was holding his crotch and he was obviously struggling to stand. 

"You just shot me," Thomas whispered in disbelief.

"Ye-Yeah. And you just ki-killed hi- Ah shit!" His hand flew to the back of his head. He stumbled and dropped the pistol before falling to his knees. "Fuck off or I'll- I'll blow your fucking brains out!" Dave yelled, voice laced with great pain. He removed his hand from his head and blood trickled down his fingers.

Thomas tightened his grip on his dagger. He stumbled out of the room, adrenaline pumping through his veins and keeping him going. He staggered his way down the staircase, getting two floors down before the adrenaline started to disappear. And he felt so exhausted. And his shoulder was screaming.

Oh.

Thomas had forgotten about the bullet, which was nicely engraved in his shoulder. Thomas moaned in pain. His leg gave out finally and he fell down the last three stairs, and he landed on his left side. Thomas held in his scream. His breathing was uneven and he took repeated breaths to try steady it, but the pain all over his body was unbearable. He tried to use his right arm to lift him up, but his head lolled down onto the floor and he caught a glimpse of his wound.

"No," he whispered weakly. "I can't die here." The halls were silent. His right arm went weak and he lay at the bottom of the stairs, bleeding out. "Help," Thomas said, but it was barely a whisper. He took a painful breath. "Help me!" He sobbed out. His eyes felt heavy and he let them close for a second. His hearing was muffled, and he didn't hear the several pattering of sneakers, and the yells of his name before he blacked out completely.

—

When Thomas woke up the air was cool on his skin and he shivered. He was laying on a soft bed and had a thin blanket covering his body up just before his shoulders. And then he froze, mind racing from the events that had just occurred.

"Holy shit! Am I dead?" He yelped, sitting up. Immediately Thomas felt his shoulder burn and he hissed. Thomas was in a hospital room. When he looked to his left he saw Newt sitting in a chair beside the bed, looking quite uncomfortable, asleep. Newt looked pale, almost grey, he had dark circles on his face and as he slept he looked as if he was frowning. He was in a position Thomas was sure would give him a sore back sooner or later. But Newt began to wriggle a little and he begun to wake up. "Oh my god. Newt," Thomas whispered. Newt's neck snapped up at Thomas, and as the brunette went to stand up Newt sprung up from his seat, grabbing onto Thomas's hips gently when Thomas almost fell down.

"Nu-uh, mister. Sit back down," Newt said, trying his best to hide the grin that was creeping up on his face.

Thomas sat back down with a grunt. "What happened?" He said, twiddling with his fingers as Newt sat on the bed next to him. Newt grabbed one of Thomas's hands and entwined their fingers together.

"Uh, Minho and Teresa found you first. They managed to get you out, obviously. When we escaped you were still out of it and we had to try to help you in the back of one of the cars." Newt's voice cracked a little, but he cleared it quickly and shifted awkwardly. "I thought we were gonna lose you, Tommy." Newt coughed again, and Thomas shuffled over closer to Newt, sides pressing together comfortably.

"It's okay, Newt. I'm okay now. How is everyone else?" Thomas asked. Newt went stiff for a second and Thomas frowned.

"Don't you worry about that right now. You should get more rest, okay?" Newt said, leaning over and pressing a kiss onto Thomas's temple. Thomas leaned into him, with a small smile on his face.

"Can you hold me?" Thomas asked, blushing a little. Newt grinned at him.

"Sure. Lay down. I'll go get a better blanket, you've got goosebumps." Newt said, prodding at Thomas's good arm which was littered with goosebumps on the skin. Thomas nodded, shuffling back around

After a minute or two of waiting, Newt walked in with a thicker blanket. He smiled gently at Thomas as he spread the blanket over him. He shuffled in beside the brunette and let Thomas lay his head on his arm despite the fact that soon it would go very numb.

They lay in silence, eyes closed. Newt used his left hand to reach over and slowly place his hand in Thomas's hair. He began to massage his scalp. After a few minutes, Thomas relaxed completely as he fell back asleep, and not soon after Newt too, fell asleep.

— Newt pov

Newt was back in the car, in the front seat twisted around to face the back seat. He had tears running down his face. He turned to Frypan who was beside him at the wheel. "Fry! Drive faster, please!" He sobbed. Frypan nodded, pushing harder on the gas.

Newt turned back to the backseat. Thomas was set up against the door and Gally and Minho were in the back.

"Fuck, Gally! Could you be any less fucking careful?!" Minho yelled, frustrated. He shoved Gallys hands away from Thomas before replacing them with his own, tightening the fabric wrapped around Thomas's shoulder and then pressing him palm onto the wound and pushing down. Minho's hands and body were soaked in Thomas's blood, and Gally was too as the back seats were covered in red. Minho's hands were shaking as he put pressure on Thomas's wound.

"Oh god. Fry, drive faster. But be careful! Avoid the bumps, just speed it up." Newt said, voice scratchy.

"I'm trying, Newt! You're not the only one scared for Thomas's life, but I'm the one trying not to crash this bloody car!" Fry snapped accidentally. "Sorry, it's-"

"No, it's fine Fry. You just focus on driving, okay? We'll handle Thomas. Sorry for pushing you." Newt said, and he would smile if his boyfriend wasn't currently in the backseat bleeding out. Fry nodded and turned back to the wheel.

-

They had made it to the hospital, and Newt helped Minho and Gally drag Thomas in while Frypan got a doctor.

"Help him!" They yelled as they pulled Thomas's limp body inside the building. Quickly, a group of nurses and doctors rushed over and placed Thomas onto a hospital bed, speeding through the halls as they sent shouts of codes and orders to each other frantically.

-

Newt sat in the hospital's waiting room next to Minho, Gally and Frypan, all in their blood-stained clothes. Newt's knee was bouncing and his nails were bitten, nervous not only for his boyfriend's life, but his friends. Since they had escaped they hadn't heard from any of them, 'them' being Teresa, Brenda, Aris and Jorge.

Minho placed his hand on Newt's knee to stop the bouncing. "Dude, try to get some sleep. You look exhausted." Minho said, removing his hand, and Newt's knee began bouncing again.

"I can't," Newt replied, staring at his shoes. "Mind's racing."

-

Newt's eyes were shut tight, trying to stop the tears that were building up from spilling out, when Minho's chair squeaked beside him. His eyes opened and he saw the doctor that he had watched wheel Thomas into the ER. He stood up quickly, following Minho over to him.

"How is he? Is he okay?" Newt said. The doctor sighed.

"I am very sorry to say this, but your friend did not make it. We tried to supply more blood into his body but the time he got here his body was already shutting down. We have done all we could. I'm sorry for your loss," the doctor said sympathetically.

"No! He isn't dead. You better get back in that bloody room and save him." Newt snapped angrily, but his eyes were watering quickly and his legs wobbled.

"I'm sorry sir, I send my condolences," the doctor said, before rushing back out of the room.

"No," Newt whispered, and he felt his knees buckle beneath him and he would have fallen if Minho hadn't grabbed onto his arm. "Noo," Newt moaned, eyes spilling tears freely now. He could practically feel his heart ripping apart and the dam that was once holding his life together fell, everything coming crashing down at once, with Thomas being the dam. Minho pulled him into a hug and they cried together, with the faint sound of Gally and Fry crying also.

\----(End of dream)

Newt's eyes snapped open suddenly. He was panting and his body was wet with sweat.

"Hey, hey, hey, it's okay." Thomas's pretty voice whispered to him. "It's okay, love. You're okay. I'm okay. You're alright," he hushed, pulling Newts body closer to his and holding him tightly.

Newt stayed silent, though he was still panting. "I had a nightmare, and- and- and-" Newt spluttered.

"Shhh, it's okay. You can tell me. Nothing bad will happen, okay?"

"You died. Tommy, oh my god. I thought you were gone," Newt whispered.

"No, darling. I'm here. See?" Thomas said, poking Newt's cheek with his finger. "I'm alive. And I'm here." Newt nodded. He relaxed into Thomas's arms, letting his eyes close but he stayed awake.

"I love you so much, Tommy. I don't know how I'd survive without you." Newt mumbled.

"I know, Newt. Me too. I love you so much, and I always will." Thomas whispered back.


	12. Lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An au where life isn't fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love making Thomas suffer >:)

Thomas stared tiredly at the fan on his ceiling as it spun. The air in the room was chill and goosebumps lifted on his skin under his hoodie. He traced the fur on his dogs back, who was asleep beside him at his hip. He could hear her small breaths under the whirring of the fan.

He sat up when there was tapping at his window. "Fuckin' finally," he muttered. He patted the dog and then stood up, sliding open his window. Newt was there grinning. "What took you so long?" Thomas asked irritatedly as he climbed out the window.

"Dunno." Newt replied, tugging his arm to help him out.

"You were supposed to be here half an hour ago," Thomas continued to complain, but Newt just shrugged carelessly.

"Whatever. How many cigs did you buy?" Newt said.

"I've got a few packs." Thomas leaned over the window a little and pulled his backpack up from the floor. He slung it over his back as he followed Newt.

"Give us one, then," Newt held his hand out. Thomas huffed and pulled out the opened cigarette packet in his hoodie pocket. He passed one to Newt and lit it for him after Newt had stuck it between his teeth.

As they neared Newt's beaten up car, Thomas asked a question he basically already knew the answer to. "Why don't you talk to me in school?"

Newt snorted as he pulled open his door and Thomas did the same. "Why would I? It's not like we're friends or anything."

Thomas put his bag by his feet. "Aren't we? If we're not friends why do we always do this?"

"Cuz' you're the only one with a decent fake id aside from Minho but he's on holiday." Newt began to drive to the nearest store.

"Wow, thanks." Thomas said sarcastically. "So when Minho comes back we're not doing this again?" Thomas crossed his arms and sighed when Newt shook his head.

The rest of the short drive was silent, with Thomas tapping his foot which annoyed Newt, so he deliberately continued to do it. When they pulled up at the store, Newt sat still.

"What?" Thomas asked, waiting for Newt to get out so he would do the same.

"I'm not going in."

"Why?" Thomas frowned. Newt huffed at him irritatedly.

"You _do_ have the ID, don't you?" Thomas nodded. "Well, go on then!" Newt leaned over Thomas and opened his door, using his finger tips to push it open.

"Okay, okay. I'm going." He held his hands up in surrender, climbing out of the car. After a moment of standing there he leaned down a little. "What one should I buy?"

Newt rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter. Just buy any one." Newt slammed the door shut in his face and waved him off, an obvious fake smile on his lips.

"Dick." Thomas muttered.

\----

Thomas could hear Newt's fingers tapping the wheel impatiently as he placed the packs of alcohol he bought into the back of the car. "Hurry it up, Thomas."

The brunette sneered. "Take it you've not got drunk in a while, then." Newt huffed in reply. "Why don't you just get your own ID? So you don't have to rely on Minho or me," Thomas shut the trunk door and got into the passenger seat.

"Dunno. It's just easier, I guess."

"Uh huh." Thomas sighed. "Or maybe you're a little late to puberty, huh? You still look like a twelve year old." Thomas picked at the frayed fabric at one of the rips of his jeans.

"Shut up. At least I have friends." And before Thomas could say anything, Newt predicted his next sentence. "And no, I'm not your friend. I told you like ten minutes ago. Thomas nodded.

"I still think we're friends. No matter how much you deny it."

Newt glared at him, but stayed silent. Thomas grinned triumphantly. Maybe Newt was his friend.

\----

Newt laughed loudly, taking another big gulp from his bottle. He had a cigarette between his fingers, and every so often would lift it to his lips and inhale from it and exhale it almost always into Thomas's face.

Thomas was still sober. There was a bottle in his hand, but he had only taken one sip but hadn't touched it otherwise. And he was glad he was. He would no doubt have to drive Newt home, or his own if he passed out. Thomas didn't know where Newt stayed. He stared into the small fire they had made, as it slowly put itself out. When it was completely out he would take Newt home. There was quiet music playing from the small speaker Thomas had brought.

"Tommy. Did you know, there's _suchh_ a huge, huge, big secret that I need to speak to you," Newt slurred, placing a sloppy finger against Thomas's pursed lips. "I love boys," Newt yelled happily. Thomas froze.

"Don't you have a girlfriend?" Newt laughed at him.

"Yep. But she's gross. I hate her." Newt roared. "I like a boy. He's so pretty. But!" Newt held up his finger. "Boys and boys?" He frowned. "Disgusting."

"No it's not." Thomas argued. Newt just shook his head. "Who do you like?"

"You." Newt poked Thomas's chest. Thomas cheeks flushed red.   
  
"I thought we weren't friends." Thomas tilted his head.

"We _are_. But we can't be. Cuz' that's bad." Newt said, his bottom lip sticking out in a pout.

"Why?" Thomas shifted so he was sitting up straighter. "Why is that so bad?" Newt looked at him like he was being ridiculous.

"Well, I don't wanna fall in love with you, _duh_."

Thomas slouched, staring down at his lap and he was silent. Even when Newt moved closer to him.

"Does Minho know?" Thomas finally said. Newt grinned.

"Nope. Didn't I already say? That's bad. Soooo bad." He exclaimed.

Thomas looked up at him. Newt was sitting in front of him, their knees almost touched. Newt had crushed his cigarette with the bottom of his now empty beer bottle.

"I don't think that's bad." Thomas said. Newt smiled gently.

"Neither do I. But not everyone thinks like us, Tommy." And then Newt kissed him. Thomas stared wide-eyed into Newt's closed ones, as their lips pressed together tightly. Newt leaned over more, placing his hands on Thomas's knees.

And then it all came to him and it was like he snapped awake. He kissed Newt back, putting arms around Newt's neck, and let his hand slip into Newt's hair. Thomas pulled Newt closer to him.

Newt moved his lips away, letting them trail down to Thomas's neck. He kissed down it gently while he placed his hands onto Thomas's hips. He heard Thomas sigh shakily as he sucked on the skin on his neck.

The fire finally went out, and Newt jumped, pulling away. "What the fuck," he yelped, slapping his hands on his face, as if he was fully sober. Thomas looked at him fearfully from the ground.

"Are you okay?" Thomas asked shyly. Newt glared at him.

"No! I am not okay!" He turned away, and closed his eyes, trying to calm himself. "I just kissed a boy," he whispered to himself.

"Yeah, and the boy is still here." Thomas said.

"I need to go," Newt quickly began to stride back to his car, leaving Thomas to scramble to his feet and jog to catch up with him after shoving his stuff back into his backpack.

"You can't," Thomas panted. "You can't drive." He took the keys out of Newt's hands.

"Fine," Newt muttered, pushing past him and getting into the car. Thomas did the same silently.

Newt didn't speak for most of the ride, until Thomas sighed irritatedly. "Are we not gonna talk about what happened?"

"I'd rather not." Newt chewed on his lip.

"Well I'd like to. One minute you're all anti-Thomas, and then you're kissing the lights out of me. What was all that about? You said you liked me!"

"Forget about what happened. I was drunk." Newt bit out.

"You still are!" Newt sighed.

"I am straight and I have a girlfriend. End of conversation." Newt said. Thomas shook his head.

"No it's not. I've not met anyone _straight_ ," he used two of his fingers to emphasise, "kiss someone the same gender as them. I don't think you're as straight as you're making it out to be." 

Newt groaned frustratedly. "Well I am! Please! Just forget about it!" He said exasperatedly.

"You know I won't." Thomas said, gripping the wheel. The rest of the drive was filled with an uncomfortable silence.

\----

The next time Thomas spoke to Newt was at school a few days after the "incident". He had had Teresa, his girlfriend, pulling to his side by her hip. She had practically been sucking the life out of his neck when Thomas came up to them, with an annoyed look on his face pointed at Newt.

"Can I talk to you?" Thomas asked as kindly as possible, though Newt could hear the irritated tone a mile away.

"Uh-huh. Sure. Sorry, T. I'll be back in one minute." Newt peeled himself away from her, and then followed Thomas as he guided him to the back of the school.

"What is it?" Newt said boredly.

"You know what it is." Thomas snapped. "Have you told her about it?" Newt laughed.

"Are you dumb? Of course I haven't!" Thomas scoffed at him.

"Why? You were basically cheating on her! Actually, scrap that. You _were_. You literally confessed your feelings for me and called her gross!"

"Because I was drunk, and I'm not gay. So, if you would so very kindly excuse me," Newt turned away, but Thomas grabbed onto his wrist and stopped him from continuing.

"No, Newt. You need to tell her. Just because you were drunk, doesn't mean that you were lying. And even if you were, you should _at_ _least_ tell her you kissed someone else."

"Fine." Newt sighed. "I'll tell her I kissed someone else. But I'm not mentioning the fact that they were a dude, and most importantly I'm not mentioning the fact that it was you."

"Why? Are you so disgusted with me, that you can't even mention my name?"

"No." Newt muttered. "But they will be."

Thomas sighed, and let go of Newt's arm. "Oh! Before you go, I wanted to ask, did you actually mean what you said? I know you said that you were drunk, but did you?"

"No."

"Oh. But I thought-"

"Whatever you thought, you thought wrong. I don't want you, and I certainly don't like you. So just drop it!" Newt fumed. Thomas's shoulders slumped.

"Okay. Bye, then." He whispered. Newt frowned and turned away. As he walked away from him, he glanced back at him and saw Thomas sliding down the cold wall and dropping his head into his hands. Despite the pity in his stomach, he forced himself to walk away. 


	13. Hospital p1

When Thomas woke up, he immediately knew something was off. First, his curtains were strung open, and instead of being under his blankets, he was uncomfortably laying across a lump of tangled sheets.. And third, he was in a pair of jeans and a plain white t-shirt.

And then his heart dropped. "Oh, shit!" He yelled, sitting up. His eyes darted to his clock. _11:08 am_. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He scrambled through the mess of blankets and when his feet hit the floor, he ditched his room immediately, racing down the stairs and almost tripping down the last two.

"What's the rush, dear?" Thomas's Mother, Anne called from the living room as Thomas gulped down the liquid from an orange juice carton.

"Why-" He paused breathlessly. "Why didn't you wake me up?" He finished, just on the brink of heaving.

"What? Why would I have to wake you up? Is your alarm not working?"

"No, it's working fine, Mom. But I always end up falling back asleep. For example this morning," he scooped an apple from the counter and as he passed the living room he continued. "The hospital thing starts today."

"Oh!" His mother gasped. "I thought that started next week. Sorry dear. I'll wake you up tomorrow."

"It's fine Mom, not your fault. Thanks," he said as he slid on his jacket. He fished his keys out of the pockets while he slipped loosely tied basic white trainers.

"Do you need a lift, Thomas?" His Mom yelled as he was stepping out the door.

"No, that's alright."

Before he closed the door, he picked up the skateboard leaning against the wall and dropped it by his feet. He put one foot on and used the other to push off the ground. _(Sorry if the description is bad, I don't know how to use a skateboard. :/)_

**\----**

"Name?" She said sternly. The woman was large and heavily wrinkled in the face.

"Oh uh, I'm here for the charity work," Thomas said and he shifted the board in his arm.

"Kay. Go ahead then."

"Uh, right. Thanks?" He mumbled sheepishly, scratching the back of his hand. He spun away on his heel and took a few small steps before spinning back around. "Sorry, uh, where am I supposed to be going?"

The woman huffed, and pointed to a door on his left with her fat finger. "Thanks," Thomas said, flashing her an awkward smile.

Thomas grimaced as he walked past a few rows of seats of patients waiting to be brought in. He walked through the door, which led to another door, which led to two doors on each side of him. He chewed on his lip, trying to think back to the meeting they had had where Mrs. Simone, head of the campaign and gave them directions on where to go. Thomas hadn't been listening, because Thomas had planned on going with Teresa, but that obviously didn't happen because Thomas ended up sleeping in. He wished he had taken one of the leaflets they had handed out, but he never, and for the same reason, and Teresa said she knew her way round the hospital well enough. 

Instead of looking for any signs, or anyone to give him a nudge in the right direction of where to go, Thomas prayed he chose the right door and took the left one. This corridor was the same, just leading to another door, but when he went through, he was met by chattering and sounds of beeping from the small rooms filled with patients.

Thomas frowned. That's weird. None of these people are kids. He shrugged it off, and decided to walk further, peeking in the occasional room to see a child, or even a pop of colour. He stopped, and turned around, looking for the door he had previously come through, but he had walked too far, and it was out of sight.

"Shit," he whispered.

"You alright?" A voice from the room he was standing beside yelled. "Y'look a bit lost there," it was a dude, and they were british.

Thomas walked over to the door and peeked his head in. The room was a little different to the others, it had an actual door, not just a clear one or a curtain, but it was opened and had a door stopper under it. There was a boy sitting in the bed in a blue gown. He had blond hair that was messy and the roots looked a tad greasy.But his face. Thomas felt his throat go dry. He was _gorgeous_. "Uh.."

The boy raised an eyebrow at him, and smirked a little. "So? What are you looking for?"

"Oh, uh, I, uh.. I'm here for the charity work with the kids but the lady at the desk pointed this way and I got lost." The boy on the bed seemed to deflate just a little.

"That's okay. There are two charity campaigns here today. The children's one; your one," he said as Thomas moved to stand fully in the doorway. "And the ones for the freaks; us. I'm joking by the way, we're not freaks. That's just what a lot of passerbyers; like you, think of us until they actually bother to find out anything about us."

Thomas frowned. "Why would they think you're freaks?"

The patient seemed to ignore his question. "What's your name?" He asked.

"Thomas. I'm Thomas."

"Great," he clasped his hands together enthusiastically. "I'm Newt. I guess you're here for the kids, then? You don't seem to know a lot about where you are."

Thomas's hand itched the back of the other, a sign of when he was embarrassed. "Uh, yeah. Do you, do you think maybe.." He trailed off, thinking he sounded awfully stupid at the current moment.

"What, I could show you around?" Newt said, grinning at Thomas. The brunette nodded sheepishly.

"But you probably aren't aloud, so I'll just go-"

Newt made a tsk noise with his tongue and hopped off of the bed walking over to Thomas. "Don't worry about that, love. I'll show you." Newt patted Thomas shoulder while the latter's cheek lit up red at the nickname. "Come on."

Thomas stood still for a few seconds while Newt began to walk, still thinking about Newt calling him 'love', and he only followed when the blond turned around, raising his eyebrow at him. "So... Newt." Thomas murmured awkwardly, trying to make conversation. Newt glanced at him and breathed out a tiny chuckle.

"This your first time here? You've made it _way_ past where the children's wards are supposed to be, I mean, you're a whole section away-" and he was cut off by a loud yell from behind one of the double doors. Thomas stopped, glancing at Newt worriedly. He looked back at the door and through the small window he could see an asian boy in the same gown Newt was in, being guided by a nurse. He had an iv in his arm and he was dragging it alongside him. The first thing Thomas noticed was that the boy was skinny, and _extremely_ skinny.

"No! I don't want to! You can't make me. I won't!" He yelled as he stopped walking.

"Minho," the nurse sighed. "Don't you want to get better? Don't you want to get back to playing sports?"

"Shut up. I'm not going." Minho huffed.

"Minho, you have to. Or you'll get tube fed." Minho yelled in frustration before following the nurse through another set of doors.

Thomas looked back to Newt, who was biting his lip. "Come on. We better go. It's lunch. Bloody useless nurse," Newt said, though he whispered the last part and Thomas almost didn't hear him. Newt grabbed Thomas on his arm just above his wrist and dragged him along until they were walking at the same pace.

"Do you know him?" Thomas asked as he walked beside Newt. The boy nodded.

"Yeah."

"Well, what's wrong with him?" Thomas asked. Newt stopped walking, just for a second.

"Nothing is wrong with him," Newt hissed.

"Well, that didn't look like nothing to me-"

"He has an eating disorder. It isn't his fault. Nothing is wrong with him."

"Oh, sorry. I was just asking," Thomas mumbled. Newt didn't reply back to him, so he just followed the boy silently.

They walked for a while, in silence, Thomas's trainers echoing in the hall and Newt's bare feet padding along. "Well, I'm not allowed through there, so just go down through those two doors and then go right," Newt said.

Thomas nodded, still feeling that Newt was still mad at him. "Thanks, Newt. See you."

"Probably not," Newt said, sounding a little disappointed. Thomas frowned. Thomas shook his head and pushed through the first door, and after it swung closed, he stopped. He turned around, opening it to apologise to Newt again about what he said to upset him, but when he opened it Newt was frozen in his place, looking conflicted. His eyes looked angry, but scared. He was staring in the air in front of him, as if something was there,but Thomas couldn't see anything. He jumped when Newt yelped. "Shut up! I was just being nice." He snapped.

And then Newt's eyes watered up. "Sorry. Sorry. I didn't mean it! I'm sorry," he rushed out. Thomas opened his mouth to say Newt's name, but suddenly Newt turned and sprinted down the hall, spluttering apologies and cuss words.

"Okay..?" Thomas whispered to himself, confused. Nonetheless, he walked through the doors and was met with a worried Teresa and a fuming Mrs. Simone. The lady grabbed onto his arm harshly, almost making him drop his skateboard and dragged him over to the corner.

"Where, on God's Earth, where you?" She hissed angrily.

"I- I slept in and then I got lost. Sorry, Miss. I'll be here on time tomorrow," he said, scratching his hand.

Mrs. Simone let go of his sleeve. "You better be. You're lucky we don't have more volunteers than we need, or else I would be throwing you out of this hospital and on the sidewalk."

"Yup," Thomas whispered and he walked over to Teresa.

"Hey Tom. You're a bit late, eh?" She smiled, snorting when Thomas glared at her. "Go put your stuff down there, and get to work."

"Whatever," Thomas muttered. For some reason, Thomas was still thinking about his encounter with Newt.

**\----**

The next day, Thomas made sure to arrive earlier than needed. He walked over to the desk, and internally groaned when he saw the lady from yesterday, but it didn't seem to put a dent in his good mood. He was excited to see Newt.

"Name?" The woman muttered.

"You don't need it." The woman gave him a look. Thomas realised that he had sounded a bit rude. "I mean, I'm here for the charity stuff," Thomas smiled at her, and when she looked up he almost thought he was seeing things when the corners of the woman's lips upturned just slightly. Thomas had snatched a leaflet from Mrs. Simone's handbag, which had a map of the hospital in it so he wouldn't get lost today. Before Thomas walked away, he took a small glance at the lady's name tag. Sandra Bergs. _Nice_ , Thomas thought, sarcastically.

As he was walking through the door on his left like yesterday, he opened up the leaflet and looked through the map. While laying in his bed the night before, he figured Newt was a patient in the psych ward section, so he looked for that. When he found it on the map, he walked through a couple hallways and through a few doors until he found him in the same place as yesterday. He had only been standing there for a moment until a nurse came up to him.

"Excuse me, sir. Are you looking for a patient's room?" She asked kindly, flashing him a smile.

"Yes, actually. Newt's. I don't know his second name, but he's blond and british-"

"Oh! Yes, I know who you are talking about. Newton Sangster I take it. He's just around the corner. Third room down on the left. Number 250."

"Thank you," Thomas smiled at her gratefully. Before he turned the corner, she spoke again.

"It's nice of you to visit him, nobody has for a while. More than a while, actually. It's a shame, he is nice," she said. Thomas was confused. Why wouldn't anyone want to visit Newt? He was lovely.

It only took him a couple minutes to find Newt's room. He held up his knuckle to knock, but he realised the boy was asleep.

"Oh," Thomas whispered, sounding disappointed. But then he had an idea. He slung off the backpack off of his shoulder and knelt down. He unzipped it and pulled out a piece of blank paper, and a light blue felt tip pen. He had brought them because a little boy, Archie had told him he liked drawing, and the only thing they had brought were colouring books. Archie didn't like colouring books.

He put the paper on the ground and began to write.

_Sorry if I offended you yesterday. I was flustered and lost and awkward. Sorry. I didn't mean it. Also, why did you run off yesterday? I came here to talk to you but you're asleep, so this is the best I could do. I'll come by tomorrow again._

_-Thomas_

Thomas smiled as he put the cap on the pen, and he folded the paper in half. He walked over to Newt's bed and stood the paper up on the table beside it. He looked back at his bag and sighed. He fetched the chocolate bar he had packed for a snack and slid it under the paper for Newt.

Once he was satisfied, he zipped up his bag and put it on his back. He was still standing beside Newt's bed, so he very non-creepily ended up staring at Newt's face for about a minute, until the nurse from earlier poked her head in.

"Hello, is everything alright in here?" She whispered, smiling gently. She noticed he had been staring at Newt, looking rather _fond_ of the blond boy.

"Oh," Thomas said, flushing. His face went red in embarrassment. He scratched the back of his hand. "Yep.. Yeah everything is just great and dandy in here," Thomas went silent. "Yeah- uh, I'll just be going." Thomas's face went a shade darker red. "Newt's asleep. Yep. Bye," Thomas said, using his thumb to point to Newt before he dashed out of the room, quickly leaving the section to go to the children's wards.

"What the fuck, Thomas? Who the fuck says 'dandy?' And why the hell were you staring at him for so long?" Thomas slapped his cheek once, and winced. He then looked down at the little girl standing by him, gaping at him. "Shit," he whispered. "No, I mean- sugar!" He scratched his hand.

The little girl giggled at him. "You're silly."

"Yup. Silly and stupid," Thomas muttered to himself as he walked into the children's wards. He walked straight to Archie's bit, where around 12 children's bed's were. Archie's bed was next to a little girl: Sonya, and a little boy called Adam.

"Stop it Archie! That's not funny anymore!" Sonya yelped, when Archie threw a sock onto her bed. She peeled it off of her bed between two small fingers, disgust plastered all over her face. Then, just as she was about to place it on the floor, she smirked and jumped off of her bed, grabbing the back of Archies head and mushing the sock into his face, giggling evilly.

"Hey! That's my sock! Archie's getting his spit on it!" Adam yelled.

Thomas decided to intervene before one of the three ended up crying. "That's enough of that, guys. Archie, I brought some paper and pens for you," Thomas said, smiling when the three children cheered at his early arrival. He put down the stack of paper and the pencil case full off coloured pens onto Archie's bed.

"Thanks Thomas!" Archie smiled, hugging Thomas's waist before pulling out a few pens and began drawing.

"Thomas! Thomas! Can you get the toys out! Please?" Sonya said, almost shouting.

"I don't know, I came early. I might have to wait until Mrs. Simone comes." Thomas said.

_Please, Thomas_? Everyone's already awake! And we're so _bored_ ," she pouted, exaggerating. Thomas glanced around at the other beds and was met with pleading faces.

"Oh, _fine_ ," Thomas huffed. He pulled out all of the toy boxes and smiled when the herd of children piled around them to find things to play with. Archie was still on his bed, drawing with another boy next to him, the boy younger than Archie. Thomas grinned when the other boy yelped and drew a line on his arm by accident. The boy pouted and hunched his shoulders.

"It's okay!" Archie said, smiling. "Look!" Archie took a pen and drew a longer line on his own arm. The boy giggled, and Archie giggled too. But Thomas frowned, when he looked at Adam's bed, the boy was still sitting on his bed, knees up to his chin, pouting. Thomas went over to the bed.

"Hey, Adam. What's wrong? Why aren't you playing?" Thomas said, putting his hand on the child's back.

"I can't tell you," Adam murmured into his knees.

"Of course you can. I won't tell anyone."

"I wanted to play with the dolls but they wouldn't let me play 'cus I'm a boy, and they said boys aren't supposed to play with dolls," Adam said, his eyes tearing up.

"Who said that, Adam?" Thomas frowned, he pulled Adam to his side and ran his hand up and down his back comfortingly. 

"Freya, F-Freya 'nd Abbie," he whined.

"Don't listen to them, Adam. Boys can play with dolls too. Okay?" Thomas said as he looked around. He spotted Sonya and another girl with short brown hair on the ground playing with a few dolls. "Hey, Adam, wait here a second, okay bud?" When the boy nodded, Thomas went over to the girls.

"Hey guys," Thomas said as he crouched down beside the two. 

"Hi, Tom!" Sonya cheered. She held up a doll to him. "Do you wanna play?"

"Oh, no thank you. I know someone that would, though," Thomas said. "Why don't you go ask Adam if he wants to play?" The two girls nodded, and left their dolls for Thomas to watch over while they ran off to ask Adam. After a minute the girls came back with a sheepish looking Adam, but he looked pleased.

When Thomas stood up, the volunteers had begun to come in and Mrs. Simone was smiling at Thomas.

\----

It had been a few hours since Thomas had seen Newt, and Thomas was wondering if the boy had seen his note. He had just finished cheering a little girl, Amy up. Amy was worried about her operation the next day. Thomas stood next to Teresa, bones aching with exhaustment. A nurse quietly entered the room, walking up to Thomas.

"Hello, are you Thomas? A patient, Newton was looking for you. He said you'd be here." Thomas's heart skipped a beat.

"Yeah, that's me."

"Well, if you wouldn't mind popping out to go see him, he said it wouldn't take long," the nurse said.

"Of course! I mean, if it's okay with Mrs. Simone," he said, looking at the woman with pleading eyes.

"That's fine. Take your time, Thomas. You've worked hard today," Mrs. Simone smiled at him.

"Thank you," Thomas nodded at her, she nodded back. 

"He'll just be in his room," the nurse added before she left.

Before Thomas could leave, Teresa grabbed onto his sleeve. "I didn't know you had anyone to visit here," she said, clearly disappointed that she didn't know who Newt was.

"Oh, I don't. Well, I do, but I met him just yesterday," Thomas said, "I'll tell you about him tomorrow. See you then." He picked up his bag off of Archie's bed, telling the boy to keep the pens and paper as he didn't need them.

Thomas then darted out of the room, almost sprinting to Newt's room. When he arrived, he was panting. Newt was swallowing a few pills and drowning it with water.

"H-hey," Thomas panting, leaning against the doorway. Newt grinned at him.

"Did you run all the way here?"

"Is it that obvious?" Thomas said breathlessly. Newt chuckled. Thomas pushed off of the doorway and walked over to Newt's bed. He took a seat in the chair beside it. "So, did you get the note?" Thomas asked.

"Of course I got the note. Thanks for the chocolate, by the way. I had to hide it from the nurse." Thomas smiled.

"Where did you hide it?" Thomas said as he looked around the room. It was a bit bland, and there weren't many hiding spots. "Not many places here."

"Up my arse," Newt replied unenthusiastically. He laughed loudly when Thomas's face dropped in disgust. "I'm kidding! Under my pillow." Thomas breathed out.

"That's a relief. Anyway, why _did_ you run off yesterday?" Thomas peered suspiciously. Newt tensed up. "I was going to apologise again and then you looked like you saw the devil and ran away."

"I, uh.. I'm.. Schizophrenic," Newt said, not looking up at Thomas.

"Oh," Thomas said blankly.

"Yeah, _oh_. If you want to leave, you can."

"No! I mean, no. Why would I leave? I like you," then Thomas went red, _again_. "Not like that, I like you as a friend. You're nice. Just 'cuz you see snakes coming out your butt sometimes doesn't mean I don't want to be your friend." Newt laughed.

"I don't think that's how it works, love," Newt said, biting his lip to keep him from smiling too much. "Thanks, Tommy. I've never really had a friend that's not in here. Not that the people here aren't nice, but y'know what I mean."

"Yeah. Do you still want me to come round tomorrow?"

"Sure. It's nice talking to you."

It was silent for a few moments, until Newt sprung out of his bed quickly.

"What is it?" Thomas asked as he slowly stood up as well, peering around curiously.

"Oh, oh god, Tommy," Newt cried. Newt grabbed onto his wrist and tugged him down to sit on his bed. He pulled a few tissues out from the tissue box on the side table.

"What's wrong Newt? What's happening?" And then it clicked. Oh. _"Oh"_

Newt's eyes began to fill with tears, and he wiped under Thomas's mouth with his shaking hand. He put his other hand on Thomas's cheek.

"Not you," Newt sobbed desperately. "I know you feel tired, love. Don't go to sleep." Newt said, talking to Thomas, but not the real Thomas. The Thomas inside his mind who had black gooey liquid dripping out of his mouth and black veins. Newt's eyes bulged weirdly, and Thomas noticed Newt had started to hold his breath, so Thomas went to touch Newt's throat to try see if he was choking on something, not like touching his neck would tell him anything but at the moment it seemed like the right thing to do. And then Newt sprung back away from him. "Stop it, Tommy! That isn't you! Stop!" Newt pleaded, raising his hands up to protect his head. Thomas's hand dropped to his side quickly, frightened that he had hurt Newt.

**_-NEWT POV-_ **

Newt had been admiring Thomas's face when he saw the black veins start to creep up his neck and face and it dripped down his wrist like rain on a car window. It covered his neck like fishnets and his eyes were enveloped in black. Gooey black liquid began to seep out of his mouth. His stomach dropped. He jumped out of his bed. "Oh, oh god, Tommy." He rushed over to him, snatching a few tissues and desperately collecting some of it into it. The liquid got on his hands but he didn't notice. "Not you," he pleaded.

Thomas's head went limp and rolled forward onto his shoulder. _No_. Newt used his hand to push his head back up and placed his hand on his cheek to keep it up. "I know you feel tired, love. Don't go to sleep." This wasn't the first time this had happened. It first happened to the chubby kid that lived next door to him back home. Chuck. Then it had happened to Gally, who was in the wards with ASPD, but weirdly it stopped halfway through, everything normal and Gally looking at him weird. _(I hope someone gets this lmfao. hint-death)_

Suddenly Thomas's hand snatched at Newt's throat, and began to squeeze the air out of his lungs. Newt shoved his hand away and bolted from the bed, backing away from him. Thomas slowly got up, inching towards him. Newt whimpered in fear and used his arms to protect his head. Just before Thomas went to attack him, he stopped, still. He was letting out small groans and moans like a zombie, and the goo was seeping through Thomas's shirt.

**_-THOMAS POV-_ **

"Newt," Thomas called out gently. "It's okay. Newt, I'm okay. What you're seeing isn't real. It's just in your head, okay? Nothing is happening right now. It's just you and me here," he was standing in front of Newt who was still cowering.

"Tommy," Newt whispered breathlessly. "How are you- How are you talking? They never do, you shouldn't be able to."

"Because it isn't real, Newt. I'm okay. You're okay. Okay? Is it okay if I call a nurse?"

"Y-Yeah. Just keep talking Tommy, please."

"Of course. It'll be over soon, 'kay? You're okay, I'm okay." He said, as gently as he could, trying not to startle Newt as he slowly edged over to the bed. He found the small remote beside it and pressed the button with _'HELP'_ printed in bold letters.

"What seems to be the issue?" a woman's voice said, coming from the remote. Thomas raised it to his lips, eye's still locked on Newt's trembling form.

"Newt is having a hallucination," Thomas said shakily.

"Okay. I'll come immediately with a few other nurses. Try to keep him calm."

"I am. I'm talking to him," Thomas said. The nurse hummed as a reply, and she could be heard gathering a few other nurses to follow her.

"Good. Keep doing that," she said, and then the voice cut out.

"What do you see, Newt?" Thomas asked, putting the remote down and moving closer to Newt. He didn't like to see Newt in his scared state.

"You- you've got black- black veins," he stopped, choking up on scared tears. "B-black veins and black eyes and you have black goo coming out your mouth." Thomas couldn't help himself but he lifted his finger and wiped his chin. Newt cried out.

"It- it is real! You- you touched it!" Newt shrieked pointing accusingly at Thomas.

"Shit!" Thomas yelped, lifting his hands up to either side of his head in surrender. "No! It's not real," he forced himself to relax, realising that panicking wasn't going to help Newt at all. "It's just that the thought of goo in my mouth is kinda gross," he grimaced.

Newt smiled at him, but it didn't reach his eyes. "I guess."

"But it isn't real. At all. Do you want to go sit down on the bed?" Newt bit on his lip, but shook his head no. "Okay, that's okay. Do you want me to go sit down?" Newt nodded. "Okay, I'll go sit down."

Thomas slowly backed away from him and sat down on the edge of the bed. Newt wasn't shaking as much anymore, but he was still looking at him fearfully.

Now that Thomas was sitting down, Newt's posture looked a little more confident. "Can you keep telling me it's not real? It helps a bit."

"Yeah, of course. Newt, I don't feel any different than I did 20 minutes ago. I still feel like Thomas. And I don't feel any goo coming out of my mouth, okay? I'm still me. Hey, do you want some water?" He offered, holding out the plastic bottle Newt had been drinking from as he entered the room. Newt took a step forward, snatched the bottle from his hands without making skin contact with Thomas and took two steps back. In any other situation, Thomas would have felt mildly hurt, but he understood.

Newt opened the cap, and took a large gulp from the bottle. When he was done, he screwed on the lip and used his hand to rub his face and eyes, wiping the tears from under his eyes and his cheeks. He kept his eyes closed for an extra few seconds, and took a few deep breaths and sheepishly opened them.

"Oh," he sighed in relief, chucking the bottle carelessly onto the bed and throwing his arms around Thomas's neck. "It's over."

Thomas smiled. His hands were itching to hug Newt back. "Is it okay if I uh, touch you?"

Newt chuckled. "No. It's almost like I am touching you with half of my body. Yes it's okay, dork." Thomas smiled and hugged him back, relieved Newt was acting more like himself now. And then the nurse and her colleagues burst into the room, startled when they saw the boys hugging.

"It's okay," Thomas said from the crook of Newt's neck. "It's over now. Sorry if I wasted any of your time." The nurse shook her head and smiled brightly. The other nurses quickly left the room to tend to other patients now with the knowledge that there was no emergency.

"Don't worry about that. Newt, I'll have to see about getting you a higher dosage of medication. Your current ones don't seem to be working as well anymore. You are getting worse. But don't worry. We will help you."

Newt and Thomas frowned at the mention of Newt getting worse, and Thomas squeezed him a little tighter, but Newt still nodded and smiled gratefully at the nurse. "Thank you."

"Now, I suggest you try taking a nap. We will get the doctor round to you tomorrow about your meds."

"Okay. Thanks," Newt said as the nurse waved and left the room, most likely to go on a call with the doctor.

Newt was silent as he sat beside Thomas on the bed for a while. "Sorry if I scared you." He sounded guilty.

"It's fine. To be honest, I was more worried about you. You uh- you started to hold your breath. That's what scared me more."

A thin blush crept up Newt's neck. "Thanks. Thanks for everything, Tommy." Newt then used his hand to pick up one of Thomas's and laced their fingers together, and placed their hands on his lap. He used his free hand to trace the back of Thomas's. He then noticed a few red lines on the back of Thomas's hand. "Why do you have scratches on your hand?" He frowned, looking at Thomas worriedly.

"Oh, uh, when I get embarrassed, anxious or feel awkward I scratch the back of it."

Newt sighed as he grazed his fingertip over it. Thomas winced, so Newt pulled his finger away. "Sorry, love. Does it hurt?" Thomas nodded.

"Yeah. I scratch it a lot." Newt looked at it sadly, before smiling at Thomas.

"Well, I personally think you should stop scratching it. Use a hair tie on your wrist and ping it onto your wrist instead. Or tap your foot. Just don't scratch it, it'll get worse."

Thomas snorted. "Okay, doctor." Newt slapped his wrist, and Thomas laughed.

"Shut up. I'm just helping you."

"I know, sorry. Thanks. So, how long have you been in here for?" Thomas asked, still staring at their hands in Newt's lap.

"Few months. I'll be in here longer if it doesn't get any better."

Thomas hadn't been sure if he should bring it up or not, but now that they had started talking seriously, he seemed it would be fitting. "Earlier today, when I came by when you were sleeping, a nurse asked who I was looking for. Uh," he went silent. He didn't know how to put it into words without sounding insensitive.

"Go on."

"She said nobody had visited for a while. Like family, friends. Why?" Newt didn't answer for a while, just shifted and rested his head against Thomas's shoulder. His blond hair fell in front of his eyes. Thomas didn't notice when he had started staring at Newt, but he couldn't bring himself to look away.

"My family are scared of me. And I don't have any friends."

"I'm your friend," Thomas replied defensively. Newt smirked.

"Knew you'd say that. I didn't say you weren't. It's just that, the ones I had before I came here all think 'm a freak. The thought of going to a hospital ward full out mentally ill people freak them the fuck out." Thomas frowned.

"They couldn't have been good friends if they didn't come here to see you."

"Thanks, Tommy." Newt smiled. "Is it weird to say that you're the closest thing I've had to a best friend and I've only known you for like, two days?" Newt said as he played with Thomas's fingers.

"No," Thomas agreed. "That's not weird at all," he paused. He lifted his hand up, still clasped together with Newts and checked his watch. His eyes widened at the numbers. "Oh, shit! Sorry. Sugar, whatever. I've got to go. I told my mom I'd be home in time for dinner. And Teresa will leave without me." Thomas sadly unlocked their fingers, and stood up.

"Will you come tomorrow? I'll wake up earlier. And I could maybe see you twice. Only if you want to, that is."

"Yeah, I'll come round. I'll leave you another note if you aren't awake. Bye Newt," he grinned, waving at Newt, who waved back and then he left Newt's room.

\----

"So, who's Newt?" Teresa asked, smirking at Thomas suggestively as she drove.

Thomas smiled and bit his lip to stop himself from smiling. "So, you know how I got lost yesterday?"

"Yeah. And also how I sat outside your house for 15 minutes until I realised you might've already left yesterday?"

"Oh, come on. You're still salty about that? Damn, girl. Anyways, I walked around for ages, and managed to find my way into the psych ward bit," Teresa turned to him, with a 'Ron Weasley' expression on her face.

"How did you manage that? That's like a whole wa-"

"A whole ward away. Yeah, I know. I've heard that sentence about three times now. Anyways. I stumble into his room, and we start talking. Oh, Teresa. He's so lovely." Thomas swooned. "He showed me where the children's wards were after, but I had accidentally said something a bit insensitive to him before but before I could apologise he had already left. He's also British," he added.

"Oh my god, Tom. How do you get so lucky? He literally seems like a god." Thomas laughed.

"This morning I came early, to go see him before we had to start with the kids. But, when I got to his room he was asleep. And he looked so perfect there I couldn't bring myself to wake him up, so I wrote him a note apologising and then I gave him the chocolate bar I brought for a snack."

Teresa gasped dramatically, slapping her hand over her heart. "No way, not the chocolate!" She grinned when he glared at her. "Seriously Tom, I think you're in love. You never give me your chocolate. Continue."

"Next time I saw him was when he got the nurse to get me. And we're good now, by the way, if you couldn't tell. Anyways, he told me that he's in the ward for schizophrenia. Then he had this hallucination thing and he said that there was black gooey stuff coming out my mouth and my eyes were black and I had black veins."

"God, poor Newt. That must have been horrible."

"I know. But when it was over we hugged for a while." He said it as if he didn't care, but in all honesty his stomach did flip whenever he thought about it. "The nurse said he'll need more meds. We sat on his bed and he held my hand. Oh! That reminded me! Do you have a spare hair tie I can use?" Teresa looked at him with disgust.

"Don't tell me Newt has a mullet. Or worse, you're growing a mullet?" Thomas laughed.

"No. He pointed out the scratches on my hand. He said instead I should use a hair tie on my wrist and ping it whenever I go to scratch it, 'cuz it's starting to hurt whenever I do because I've been doing it more often.

"How come when I try to get you to stop you shake it off but when this guy you've known for a day tells you to, you're obeying his every wish like he's the Queen? Oh well. It's better than getting a bloody skin graft." She joked.

"Well, do you?"

"Yeah. Just not right now. I'm wearing the one I brought and the other one I had snapped. I'll give you one tomorrow. Are you seeing him tomorrow?"

"Yeah. I can't wait. I haven't stopped thinking about him, T. Anyway, this is my house. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah. You really must like him. He sounds nice. I need to meet him. See you tomorrow, Tom," she said as Thomas stepped out of her car and began walking up the path to his door.

"Mom! I'm home!" He yelled into the house as he slipped off his shoes and jacket.

"Hi, love. How was your day?" His mother peered her head out from the kitchen while she wiped her damp hands on the cloth she was holding.

"Brilliant. Amazing. Best day this whole year."

"I'm glad," she smiled at him. "Oh, I just finished dinner. It's on the table."

"Thanks Mom," he gave her a kiss on her cheek as he walked past her. "Is Dad in yet?" 

Thomas's mom's mood seemed to dampen as her shoulders dropped. "No, he has to work late again tonight."

"Again? This is like the millionth time this month!"

"You can't blame him, love. He does it for you and me. You know that." She sat in the chair opposite him.

"If he wants to do it for us he should be home to see us." Thomas said a little angrily.

"Don't say that Thomas."

Thomas sighed, scratching his hand. "Sorry. I shouldn't have said that. You're right, he does do it for us. I just miss him." His mother smiled at him, a sad smile as she pulled away the hand that was scratching the other and held it in hers.

"I know, darling. I do too. He promised me he could find a day at the weekend for us. Okay?"

Thomas nodded, and then began to eat his dinner.


	14. Hospital p2

For the next week, Thomas saw Newt everyday. Most days, just once, but it was enough to satisfy the both of them for the night until they met again. But by the end of the week, Thomas noticed Newt looked worse than he had ever seen. His eyes had large circles underneath them. His hair was messy and knotted. His skin was extremely pale and even had a tint of grey on it. And to add to Thomas's suspicions, whenever he asked how Newt was doing, he would ignore the question.

Thomas frowned slightly, his hand which was tracing up and down the side of Newt's boney arm coming to a halt. Newt, who previously had his eyes shut, opened them and peered up at Thomas's face. Thomas was laying across Newt's bed, with Newt beside him. Newt was using Thomas's elbow as a pillow and their sides touched.

"What is it?" Newt asked, looking at Thomas with his big curious eyes.

"I'm worried about you," Thomas huffed, praying that this time he would get an actual answer off of the boy. Newt's eyes casted back down.

"You shouldn't be. I'm fine," Newt said reassuringly, but Thomas wasn't fooled.

Thomas shuffled down a little, so they were laying beside each other, squished together so as to not fall off the small bed. "But you're not! You look like something from the walking dead. Please," Thomas begged. "Talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

Newt hesitated, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "It's getting worse," he mumbled. "They're happening more often and they last longer and they're horri-" Newt paused and his shoulder's jumped as he let out a quiet sob. Thomas sighed sadly and pulled Newt closer to him, if that was possible.

Thomas rested his hand on Newt's head as the boy cried into his shoulder. "It's okay. I know, darling," he repeated softly, calming him down.

"Make them stop, Tommy. Please," Newt cried. Thomas himself felt tears build into his eyes. He couldn't bear to see Newt look so broken and vulnerable. Thomas let Newt hit his chest with weak fists as he let his emotions out as he slowly consoled him.

"I'm sorry, love. I know it hurts. I'm here, okay. You're safe. No one here will hurt you, my sweet boy. You don't deserve any of this," he whispered into Newt's hair. Newt was only sniffing sadly now. "I'm sorry I brought it up," Thomas said.

"No. Don't be sorry. I need to talk about it and if you didn't I never would have."

"Okay," Thomas sighed in relief. "But, have you been sleeping? You don't look great."

Newt shook his head lightly. "Not really. It's hard. They keep me up at night," and Newt didn't need to clarify because Thomas already knew what he was talking about. "And even when I do get to sleep I get nightmares and I wake up."

And Thomas didn't get the chance to reply because Newt hissed in pain as he shoved himself off of the bed and off of Thomas. In Newt's eyes, Thomas's entire body had just been engulfed in flames, and very quickly the fire touched his bed and that began to build up into flames as well. Newt screamed, taking large handfuls of hair and tugging at his scalp.

Newt could feel the fire's warmth hit his face harshly and the smoke sucked away at his lungs. "Nooo," Newt moaned, almost shouting. Newt knew that what he was seeing wasn't real but he could feel the fire on his skin and could smell the smoke so vividly that he couldn't think straight. "Tommy," he cried, backing away as the fire caught onto the paper on top of his bedside drawers and quickly set the cabinet on fire too.

Newt watched, heart in agony as Thomas's form, on fire began to come closer to him. "No, he whined. "Stay away from me," he suddenly screamed, eyes wide and terrified. The body stopped moving, lifting up what would have been arms to raise them in surrender quickly. But by now, the whole side of the room with his bed was now in flames, and every second that passed the fire got closer to him. Newt tried to run for the door, but his feet were lead and he couldn't move his legs. He was stuck, and the fire was going to get him.

It was like Newt watched his whole life tear away from him almost mockingly, as he stood paralyzed. Thick tears dripped down his cheeks and fell from his chin onto his shirt, creating small damp circles on the fabric. His breathing was erratic, and almost static like. His throat felt dry and his lungs felt like they were shrinking inside of him, every gulp of air getting smaller each time. He lifted up the hem of his shirt, and spat into it. He pressed it to his mouth and held his hand up against his face.

Newt wanted to cry, he wanted to sob and scream until he couldn't. Or he would like to lay next to Thomas and watch a movie. Or he would like to be anywhere but there. His arm fell limp and the useless cloth fell away from his face, and he felt his head spin. The feeling of his legs returned to him and he sprinted out of the room. Newt fell to the floor outside of his room, clutching his chest, sobbing and coughing. Nurses ran up to him and people gave him weird looks.

"Fire," he sobbed. "Fire! Fire! There's a fire! Can't you see?" Newt screamed, fingers grabbing his chest and throat.

"It's not real, Newt," a familiar voice said.

"No, no, it is, it is!" he cried. A gentle hand rested on the top of his back.

"It's not. There is no fire. It's not real, okay?" the voice reassured. "I know it seems real, and you felt it all, but it isn't. You need to believe me."

"B-but-" he whimpered.

"No, no. No buts, Newt. It's not real," two thumbs pushed his eyelids shut from the view of the floor. "Breath, Newt."

After a few seconds the boy removed his thumbs from Newt's face and he gently guided Newt's face to look at the room. Newt almost weeped in relief. The room was untouched, and when he looked over to his right, Thomas was standing, chewing his lip and pinging the hair tie around his wrist onto his skin. He sat down properly, leaning into the chest beside him.

"Thanks Minho," Newt whispered. Minho smiled kindly.

"So, who's your new boyfriend, huh?" Minho whispered, laughing quietly when Newt punched his leg.

"Shut up," Newt hissed, his cheeks going pink. "His name is Thomas, if you need to know that bad." A nurse interrupted them, the same lady as usual. She informed him that she would get him another appointment with his doctor.

"He looks nice. But, right now, he looks a little jealous," Minho said, once the nurse had left.

Thomas was still standing awkwardly by them. "Uh, I'll just- er, go. Yep. Bye Newt," he rushed out, turning back into Newt's room and walking over to grab his bag.

"No!" Newt yelped, springing up from the floor. His cheeks flushed even more. Minho smiled and left the two to return to his own room. "Stay, please," he said as he leaned against his doorframe. Thomas nodded, and sat down on the bed.

"Is that your boyfriend?" Thomas asked, looking down at his lap. He almost looked disappointed. Newt laughed loudly, making Thomas jump.

"Oh, fuck, what? No!" Newt laughed. Newt sat down beside Thomas. "I like somebody else. He's cute."

Thomas's shoulders slumped. Newt thought he might've even seen him pout a little bit. "Is he in here?"

"No. He visits me sometimes."

"Oh. I thought it was just me that visited. That's good though."

"You are," Newt said, smiling.

"I'm what?"

"The only one that visits me," Newt said quietly, and he bit his lip to stop himself from smiling.

"Oh. Wait, what?" Thomas was silent for a few seconds. Thomas looked at Newt, frowning at him, puzzled. "But, doesn't that not mean that you-" Newt couldn't stop himself, but surged forward and silenced Thomas by pressing his lips against the other's. It was only a small kiss, though, as Newt pulled away, but he could still feel Thomas's breath on his face.

"It's always you, Tommy. It's always you," Newt whispered. And with that, Thomas leaned in and kissed Newt again. But this time, they closed their eyes and cherished the moment. They were so in love nothing else mattered in the world right now. Nothing else but them with their bodies pressed together and their lips connected with another. It didn't matter that Newt might not be perfect, but neither was Thomas; but together they were one and that one thing was the most beautiful thing to live.


	15. Hospital p3

Thomas lay across Teresa's bed, where she sat against the headboard scrolling through tik tok on her phone. Thomas was staring at a picture on his phone of him and Newt. He had a huge smile across his face and he was letting out very 'manly' squeals.

"Oh, my god, T. I can't wait," he said. She sighed but a small smile still spread across her lips.

"I know that. You've said that about a billion times. In the past ten minutes. Anyways," she said, putting down her phone. "Is your mom still okay with him staying with you?"

"Yeah. She changed her mind a few times, but I managed to convince her in the end. Dad's working late again so he won't meet Newt tomorrow," Thomas huffed, picking at his phone case.

"When is your dad _not_ working?"

"I know, but I think Newt's kinda glad he is, because he looked relieved when I told him. He won't be staying for long, though. Just till he finds somewhere to stay."

"I still can't believe Newt's parents have basically thrown him out. They didn't deserve him."

Thomas scowled. "Don't remind me. If I ever meet them I'll beat the shit out of them." Teresa snorted. "He is gonna try to get in contact with his aunt though, he thinks she might let him stay with her."

"That's good. But at least he's getting out," she said. Thomas nodded silently before he sat up.

"What's the time?" Thomas asked while he stretched his arms above his head.

"Uh, ten past nine." Thomas turned to her with his eyebrows raised.

"Oops. I stayed longer than I thought. Well, I'll see you tomorrow, maybe?" Teresa smiled at him as she picked up her phone again.

"See you soon. Have fun laying awake all night," she said, and before Thomas could disappear from her room, she added, "Good luck!".

\----

Thomas walked up to the desk, and saw that a different lady sat in the seat.

"Hi, dear. How can I help you?" She asked kindly.

Thomas fiddled with the flowers in his hands. "I'm here to pick someone up," he said nervously.

"Okay, dear. What is their name?"

"Newton Sangster," Thomas said. The woman smiled brightly.

"Ah, okay. Just go take a seat and he will be around soon."

"Thank you," Thomas said. When he sat down, his leg began to bounce anxiously, and his stomach was doing flips. He fiddled with the stem of one of the flowers, but stopped when one tore off into his hand. "Oops," he whispered almost silently to himself. He shoved the stem piece into the flowers and rearranged them so it wasn't visible. Just as he was finished, a pair of worn out sneakers stepped in front of him. When he looked up, Newt was standing, bag over his shoulder, grinning widely at Thomas.

"Hey Tommy," Newt said, excitement obvious in his voice. Thomas stood up.

"Newt," Thomas said, almost jumping happily. He went to grab Newt's hand, but when the blond looked down at Thomas's hands, he followed the trail with his own eyes. When it stopped on the flowers he held, he jumped. "Oh! I got these for you!" He said, handing them to Newt.

"Thanks Tommy," Newt said, pecking Thomas's cheek before lacing their hands together.

"Let's go then. You'll like my mom. I know you will." Thomas said excitedly, pulling Newt behind him by the hand.

"I'll find a place soon, Tommy. It's just for a while," Newt said, sounding insecure. Thomas stopped, stepping in front of his boyfriend. He pressed his finger up to Newt's lips.

"Sh. You know you can stay for as long as you need. Okay?" When Newt nodded, Thomas continued to pull Newt along.

Thomas's mom was leaning against the car when they reached it. She smiled warmly at him, opening her arms and pulling Newt in for a hug. "Hello, dear! It's wonderful to finally meet you, Newt. Thomas has told me all about you," she winked. Thomas flushed red and huffed, but he still smiled a little.

"Thank you for letting me stay. It'll only be for a little while," he said, despite Thomas's talk that took place about two minutes ago.

"Do not thank me, darling. You are welcome to stay for as long as you need, and whenever you want. Now, let's get a move on, shall we?" She said, tugging the bag off of Newt's shoulder and walking over to the back of the car. "In you go," she said. Thomas sat in the passenger seat and Newt sat in the back, behind the driver's seat.

"So, do you mind that you'll have to share my bed?" Thomas said as he fastened his seatbelt.

"Not at all," Newt winked at him. Thomas rolled his eyes despite his red cheeks.

\----

"So, what do ya wanna do?" Thomas said as he flopped down onto his bed.

"Let's watch a movie," Newt sat next to Thomas, reaching over and turning on the tv that sat at the end of Thomas's bed.   
  
Thomas giggled. "Can I pick the movie?" He asked, picking up the remote from the bedside table. He flicked over to netflix and selected his account.

"Sure. Make sure it's not shit." Newt shuffled under Thomas's blankets, pulling his boyfriend with him and making them comfortable. Once they had stopped moving around, Thomas put his hand over Newt's eyes, making him yelp.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

"Picking a movie. You can't look until I've picked it," Thomas said cheekily.

Newt huffed. "You could've just told me to close my eyes."

"You would've peaked. I'm not stupid."

"Woah, really?" Newt teased.

"I'm the one with practically a weapon in my hand and you're the one with your eyes closed. I'd shut your mouth if I were you."

Newt laughed loudly. Before he could retort, he could see again. Newt chuckled when he almost immediately recognized the intro to _legally blonde_. "Oh, for christ sake. Again?"

"Yeah! What's wrong with it? It's a good movie!" Thomas whined.

"We've watched it like 20 times."

"Is that such a bad thing though?" Thomas said. Newt didn't reply, instead wrapping his arm around him and holding him close.

\----

Around halfway through the movie, Newt found himself getting distracted. He ended up looking around Thomas's room, and peering at the night sky from the slit of the window visible from behind the curtains that were slung shut. He glanced down at Thomas, who was fully immersed in the movie, face lightened up from the colours on the screen.

Thomas was beautiful, to make it simple. Even when he lay there beside Newt, messy hair and a large hoodie on. His cute nose, pretty lips, rosy cheeks with faint freckles that appear darker in the summer. Newt smiled to himself as he admired his boyfriend. His stomach felt like it would explode from love and happiness.

"I love you, Tommy," Newt said shakily, afraid it was too early and maybe Thomas didn't love him back.

Thomas looked over at Newt, and the blond had never seen him smile bigger. "I love you too, idiot." Thomas kissed Newt on his mouth, grinning like a mad man in love. 


	16. Sleepless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Thomas can't sleep until he hears a pretty blond boy singing.

Thomas lay in his bed under a blanket to protect himself from the cool air flowing in from his window, and his very awake and open eyes watched the thin, almost see-through grey curtains flow gracefully through the air, guided by the breeze. The thin fabric allowed the gentle spring sun shine into Thomas's room, but not too much to the point of having to squint to see properly. His eyes traveled back to his ceiling. He sighed heavily, before using his hands to push himself up so he was sitting. He looked over at his clock and huffed when he saw the time. It was 6:28am; meaning he had lay in his bed for at least 3 hours thinking of everything and nothing after spending the rest of the time on his phone till he got bored. There was still a while until Teresa and Minho got up, so he decided to get up and get ready until his roommates did too.

He slid out of bed, shivering when his bare feet touched the cold floor. He quickly and carelessly picked out an outfit, seeing as he didn't have anybody to impress, but more the fact that he just couldn't be bothered with trying. He left his room after pulling on a pair of mismatching socks and applying a thin layer of concealer under his eyes to cover the dark circles under them, now wearing black jeans, a white t-shirt and a dark green and black flannel on top.

He walked into the kitchen and after looking around for a bit, he pocketed a breakfast bar but not actually eating it. He decided on watching Netflix for the rest of the time as he waited for his friends to wake up, switching from a few shows and movies but finally picking his favourite show Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

Thomas let his mind slip away from the episode he had already watched one too many times and let it return to his boyfriend, Newt. He played with his fingers on his lap, smiling almost sadly at them as he thought about how there was still a while left until he came back home. You see, Newt was away in a foreign country with his family that he didn't see often as they still lived back in England. Newt had tried to get Thomas to come along but Thomas managed to convince him to go without him as Thomas didn't want his family dealing with his bad sleeping habits and everything else in general, but Newt didn't know that. He thought Thomas would have gotten homesick, and he left a little unsure but on his own.

The blond had told Thomas to call him when he wanted to go to sleep, knowing he struggled a lot with falling asleep without Newt there with him. He usually sang a quiet song to his boyfriend- as cheesy as it sounds. But Thomas felt guilty for disturbing the time Newt could be using to spend with his family, so he didn't. For a while, he got on with the few voice memos he had of Newt singing, using them to fall asleep, but after only a while they didn't work anymore. It wasn't the same as having Newt there beside him. Now the nights were spent with him laying awake, waiting until the sun rose.

"Morning, Tom," mumbled Teresa, startling Thomas and bringing him back to reality from his tired, daydreaming state. The girl strolled slowly into the kitchen, feet dragging on the floor and rubbing the sleep out her eyes. Her hair was a mess, one side flat against her cheek while the other half was frizzy and all over the place.

Thomas snorted. "Morning, zombie." Teresa never seemed to notice the insult in her sleepy daze as she didn't retort back with her usual snarky comeback. She pulled a banana from the fruit bowl and peeled it open as she rested her elbows on the kitchen counter, drowsy eyes now focused on the tv.

"Is Minho still sleeping?" Thomas asked as he turned back to the screen as well and began to pick at his fingernails.

"Yep," she murmured, and just before Thomas managed to speak any words out of his open mouth, Teresa held up her hand and shushed him. Thomas scoffed, but stayed silent. Once Teresa had finished her banana, she tossed it into the trash, and just as she left and was about to step into the hallway with the three bedrooms, she turned back to Thomas. "Have you eaten yet?" She asked. Thomas smiled, waving his hand dismissively as he replied.

"Yeah, don't worry. While you're going, could you wake up the sleeping beauty? It would be great to have him at least half awake when we get there." Teresa nodded, eyes still just about closed.

"Uh-huh, will do. Pray for me, Tom," she said before disappearing into Minho's room.

\----

By the time it was the afternoon and Thomas was in the cosy little restaurant accompanied by his friends. He sat on one side of the table with Teresa and Brenda, Teresa being sat in the middle between the two. Minho sat on the other side with Gally and Aris. Minho had been sulking most of the time as his boyfriend, Ben hadn't been able to make it. Thomas would've said a snide joke about it but he was beginning to feel the familiar tiredness begin to wave over him. He also would've pointed out the fact that Teresa had practically been drooling all over Brenda the whole time.

Teresa nudged his arm gently and subtly left her conversation with the others to whisper in Thomas's ear. "Hey Tom. You okay? You've been awfully quiet."

"Oh, No. I'm fine. I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night," he said. Teresa nodded in understanding, pity evident in her eyes.

"You missing Newt?" She said, Thomas nodded as he bit down on his lip to stop himself from breaking down into hysterical tears. He got emotional when he was tired. He looked down at his lap sadly.

Teresa sighed, before nudging him again. This time when he looked up, she was grinning at him. When he raised his eyebrow unenthusiastically at her, she said, "Tom, I think you're forgetting something."

"What?" Thomas mumbles irritably.

"Newt comes home tonight," she said, grinning cheekily. Thomas stared at her blankly for a second, before gasping loudly. The whole group turned to look at the pair, confused.

"Oh my god, Teresa! I completely forgot!" Thomas exclaimed happily.

Teresa smiled at him. "I suppose that's what sleepiness does to ya, Tom."

The group all seemed pleased when Thomas became himself again, bubbly, smiling and non-stop talking, because for the majority of the meal Thomas had been silent.

\----

When the three returned home, Minho went straight to his room to facetime Ben, and Teresa only stayed for a while before going over to Brenda's place. She promised him that she would be back before Newt got home though, because undoubtably Thomas would force him into their apartment like usual.

Thomas sat, bored for most of the remaining time of the day before Newt came back. He finished the rest of the season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine he had been watching; which took up most of the time, he danced around his room like a boy in love (which he was) until his legs gave out; and that didn't take long as his body was already exhausted enough from the lack of sleep. When Teresa got home, it was around 7pm, and the sun was beginning to set but Thomas still couldn't sit still. He bounced around the living room and kitchen, and even when Teresa managed to get him to sit down, his foot still tapped and his knee still bounced.

He finally managed to calm down a little when Minho suggested he listen to music, so Thomas put his earphones in and began to play the voice memos of Newt's voice. Despite what he said, Thomas found that very quickly, his eyelids began to feel a little heavier, and after a while, he felt himself drift off to a calming sleep.

When he woke up again, he was in his room, in the dark. He wasn't alone though, as Newts unmistakable arms were wrapped around him, and Thomas's head was on his chest. He could hear his heartbeat on his ear and could feet Newt's chest rise and fall steadily as he slept. Thomas smiled sleepily. He closed his eyes to go back to sleep, but unlike others might, he now felt wide awake unfortunately.

He looked at his clock, and he had woken up after around 2 hours, as it was nearing 15 minutes past midnight. Thomas also now felt awfully clammy so he shimmied out of Newts arms and tip-toed over to his window and opened it. When he returned to his bed, Newt was awake.

"Oh, sorry, Newt. Did I wake you up?" Thomas whispered into the dark as he climbed back into bed.

"That's okay, love. Teresa told me you haven't been sleeping well?" Newt replied, gratefully taking Thomas back into his arms.

"Yeah. It's hard when you're not here," Thomas said as he moved till he was comfortable. Newt placed his hand on Thomas's cheek, his fingers just touching the brunette's hairline. He stroked Thomas's cheek with his thumb.

"I know. I'm sorry I left you Tommy," Newt whispered as he pressed a kiss into Thomas's hair.

"Oh!" Thomas chirped, lifting his head off of Newts chest for a moment. "You need to tell me all about it tomorrow." Newt smiled. They went back to silence and Thomas thought Newt might've fallen back asleep, so he began to wriggle around trying to fall asleep.

Just as he started to wriggle again, Newt, who apparently wasn't asleep, moved his grip on Thomas and the brunette went still.

"Stop moving," Newt hissed.

"Sorry," Thomas whispered guiltily.

Newt sighed. "It's okay. Do you want me to sing?" Thomas never replied verbally, just nodded his head against Newt's chest. "Okay," Newt murmured happily as he began to run his fingers through Thomas's hair.

And only when Newt began singing did Thomas find himself beginning to feel a little tired, and when Newt finished the song Thomas was asleep in his arms, letting the dark eyebags and pale skin fade away as he slept.


End file.
